Hey there.
Below are fifteen of the most creative pick-up lines I could put together. Each of them are ready for use, and are eager to be slid slid into DM’s, Tinders, Grinders, OK Cupids, or even a good-old fashioned ear.
There may be some unintentional overlap — great, shameless minds sometimes think alike — but, again, these are certified fresh absurdities.
Use them well. If you’re using them for comedy, I want my citation. If you’re using them for smooches, ride free and prosper.
Just know that I’ve got your back out here.
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1. Hey girl, are you OJ Simpson? Because I’d like to make a career based on getting you off when it seemed impossible.
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2. Hey girl, am I reconciling with your failures? Because I’m hard right now.
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3. Hey boy, are you a Secret Santa present given by a co-worker? Because at this point if it’s wrapped up, I’ll pretend it’s what I wanted.
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4. Hey boy, are you the recasting of Jared Leto as “The Joker” in the Sinister Six movie? Because I think you’re fine but I’m going to be thinking about Heath Ledger the whole time.
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5. Hey boy, are you Barack Obama? Because I was into you, like, years ago, and you won’t stop emailing. Also, my parents hate you.
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6. Hey girl, are you whiskey shots? Because I want to do you first thing in the morning and then in the bathroom at work and I think I have a problem.
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7. Hey girl, are you a self-referential joke? Because I’m doing you, sure, but you kind of hate how I’m going about it.
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8. Hey boy, are you the true heir of Slytherin? Because I want to let you into the chamber of secrets, but we gotta check that tongue-work first.
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9. Hey girl, am I your self esteem and hopes? Because I’d like to steadily go down on you for years.
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10. Hey boy, are you campaign finance reform? Because I’m really into you but I know it’s pretty hopeless.
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11. Hey girl, are you Ello.com? Because I’d like to check you out, do you once, and then ignore your emails.
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12. Hey boy, are you Donald Trump’s smug face? Because I’d like to hit it, and to hell with the consequences.
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13. Hey boy/girl, are you my college debt? Because I could see being with you for the rest of my life.
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14. Hey girl, are you the half-time show? Because you can be amazing, beautiful, and impressive but all I’m gonna think about is sharks.
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15. Hey girl, are you a lazy joke format? Because I’d like to do you over and over and then get paid for it. 
