Read This The Next Time Someone Tells You To ‘Just Get Over It’

A young woman in a headscarf looking up with her hand under hair chin
Tachina Lee / Unsplash

We’ve all heard the phrase, “get over it.” We ourselves have probably at one point or another said, “I am over it.” For the longest time, I had the mindset that things happened, things passed, and it was our job to work through our feelings about it until we felt indifferent and we could be “over it” and move on.

One day after my fight with indifference turned into a lesson where life taught me that the more indifferent we feel, the less compassionate and alive we feel. This was the moment realized something very important.

Some things stick with us, and they stay with us for as long as we are breathing.

Sometimes we never get over the way someone else adores the cracks in our hands and the most vulnerable parts of our body. Sometimes we never get over the things like dancing under the moon and pouring our heart out of our body and onto a piece of paper in the form of a letter.

Sometimes we don’t get over our heartbreak.

Sometimes we never get over the failure we feel for not landing our dream job, or all of the other pressures we put on ourselves and scold our bodies for for not being able to accomplish when we want to.

Sometimes we never get over death, sometimes we mourn it each and every day until mourning starts to look different.

Maybe we will never get over the fact that we said too much or that we said too little.

Maybe the purpose of grief is to not get over it but to get through it. 

Maybe we are supposed to embrace the fact that there will be things that we carry for the rest of our lives.

Sometimes we never “get over it,” and we aren’t supposed to. We as humans are strong enough and made to endure, survive, and carry the memories of the most unexplainable moments. We are wired with the courage and the ability to exist regardless of the stories we have to tell.

Understand that your desire for happiness, inner peace, and freedom, is not based on how successfully you can “get over” things, but rather a result of your willingness to go through them in the first place. TC mark

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