I often sit back looking at where I am now in my life and realize that every single event in years past has made my life what it is today. For a very long time I relived the past years thinking that I made some very horrible choices and that I should have lived life differently. It took me a very long time to acknowledge that you cannot regret your decisions and actions and that if you had the chance to do them over again, you could never replicate your current life by changing them. Over the last few months, something clicked and I finally realized that the most important thing in life is to never settle for less than you deserve. And you only deserve the best.
I won’t bore you with details of how I met this girl I am currently dating but it’s a novel to say the least. To sum it up she is seven years younger than me, gorgeous, extremely intelligent and comes from one of sweetest and most grounded families I have ever met. She treats me like a king, she appreciates and loves me. What took me so long to find her? I am still trying to figure this out. I was with a woman in college who blacked out drunk and cheated. I was with a woman for five years who had an array of issues involving jealousy. Why did I go through all the ups and downs with them for so long? Why am I not having those issues with this girl? Is it because she is young? Is it because I am older now? I just cannot figure it out and I stop myself every single day from dwelling on it because for once in my life I am actually happy.
I think that what is making this so successful now is that I was patient. After the five year relationship I was in, I was single for a year before I took my current girlfriend out on a date. In that time I didn’t get serious with anyone. I stopped to reevaluate my life and what I wanted in my future. I would take a woman to dinner and she would say something about a 50k engagement ring and I knew right then that if we turned into something, years down the road that would be an issue. I met another woman who didn’t own a TV and played the acoustic guitar. I knew with her it just would not have worked because I love television and I am not a hippie. With only these two instances, I can honestly say that I could have settled if I just bit my tongue. I didn’t because I knew that if I waited, I would find a woman I see as perfect. I’m sure my girlfriend is rolling her eyes as she reads this because she says when I say that, it makes me sound so picky. I am far from perfect but I tell her all the time that there is a guy out there for her that she will not find one thing wrong with. I am hoping I am that guy because if so, we will be happy for life.
It is so easy to settle on someone you aren’t 100% happy with. I’ve done it and chances are you have too. It’s the pain of going through relationships, growing up and learning what you really want to be happy in life. No one is perfect but everyone is perfect in someone else’s eyes. You just have to find that person. In the meantime, never settle.