This Is How Our Generation Is Ruining Romance

a couple holding hands
joyce huis

We scroll through our phones, missing out on the eyes that gaze at us. We download the next new dating app, but only use it at night when we are drunk and lonely. We sleep with people, before we know their last names. We think we know what love is supposed to feel like, but do we really know?

We go on dates after date. But are we really trying to get people, or are we just craving attention? Are we looking for instant gratification, or are we looking for true love?

I don’t remember the last time a guy actually made me blush from excitement. I don’t remember the last time a guy actually made an attempt to woo me, to make me feel like I was the only one in the room. I don’t remember the last time a guy ever really tried.

I don’t need flowers every day. I don’t need the candles. I don’t need the sparkly presents wrapped in ribbon. That’s not the kind of romance I’m talking about. I’m talking about giving me the time of day. I’m talking about eye contact. I’m talking about telling jokes that make me throw my head back laughing.

The type of romance I’m talking about is not something that can be seen. It is only something that can be felt.

What happened to the butterflies? To first kisses that made you feel like you were flying. What happened to whispering until the sun rose the next morning? What happened to first dates that go so smoothly, it feels like the two of you have known each other your entire lives? What happened to the touch of a hand that sends chills up and down your spine? What happened to wanting to commit to one person, and happily so?

What happened to our generation understanding what love truly is?

We need less phones and more one on one conversation. We need more dates and less texting. We need more picnics and hand holding and telling secrets in the dark. We need more questions and interest instead of only wanting a body for a night. 

We need more love and less lust.

Romance isn’t dead. I know that most people crave dates that lead to love. I know there are people out there that are dying to fall head first in love without any doubt. I know there are people out there who can hold a conversation. Who can go on a date without looking at their phone every two seconds. I know there are people out there who truly want to find their soulmate.

How long is it going to take for us to look up from our screens and experience the world and the people around us? How long is it going to take for everyone to want a stable relationship instead of a one night stand? How long is it going to take for us to cry out, I love you, I love you, I love you, without any hesitation?

I hope we all find it someday. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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