No human being is perfect. We are not robots. We have hearts that break and bleed. We have souls that make mistakes. We feel guilt. We feel greed. We are selfish and self-centered. We fail. And we hurt.
I am not perfect. Actually no, I am FAR from perfect. I talk too much. I say things I shouldn’t. I laugh at the worst moments. I get jealous easily. I bite my nails when I’m bored. I freak out when there’s nothing to freak out about. I act impulsively. And I complain, way too much. About things that shouldn’t even matter.
I’m not going to therapy because I am insane. I’m not going to therapy because I’m crazy. I’m not going to therapy because I am mental.
I’m going to therapy because I want to better myself. I want to better myself as a person. As a human being. As a friend. As a daughter. And as a sister.
I’m going to therapy to love myself harder. To treat myself better. To care for myself in ways that no one else can. I’m going to therapy to love parts of myself that I haven’t found compassion for yet. I’m going to come to terms with my mistakes, and to accept me for me. The good and the bad parts.
I’m going to therapy to be a better listener. To have more compassion for people who I tend to block out. I’m going to therapy to allow myself to love more than I ever have loved. And I’m going to therapy, to find parts of me that need caring for.
I not only want to be a better person for myself, but I want to be a better person for everyone else. I want to be more understanding, to be more forgiving, and to be more loving. I want to be the kind of person that can light up other people’s lives. I want to be the kind of person to make other people smile.
I have a long way to go. I’m 24. I don’t have a lot figured out yet. I constantly trip over my own words. I mess up. Sometimes, I hurt people. I beat myself up over the smallest of things. I drown myself in worries, almost constantly.
Please, don’t be afraid to go. Don’t give into the stigma. Don’t let other people decide what is not best or best for you to do. Don’t be frightened of it. Don’t shy away from it, and give into the thinking that only ‘mentally insane’ people need therapy.
You are not a perfect human. You do not have a perfect heart, or perfect lungs to carry the pain that you have held onto so deeply. You don’t have to hold onto this pain, or this guilt, or this anxiety. You don’t have to try to stay so strong for other people, when inside you feel like you are going to explode.
Try it. Just try it for one session. I dare you. And I dare you to be pleasantly surprised.