This Is How Anxiety Is Ruining Your Life (Without You Even Realizing It)

Allegra Messina
Allegra Messina

They tell us that we need to calm down. That we need to relax, and take a chill pill. They tell us that we are being overdramatic, and that we need to look at life more realistically. They tell us that we need to keep our chins up, and not fret about what we cannot control.

But that’s the thing about anxiety. There’s no logic to it. There is no control when it takes over your lungs. There is no’ chill pill’ to take. There is no steady ground to step on after anxiety takes flight. There is no escape.

They tell us that we are being ridiculous. That we need to get a massage, or have a day of self care. They tell us in a few days we will feel better. Just give it a few days, you’ll see.

But it doesn’t get better.

And then they start noticing. Noticing our pale skin in the mirror. Noticing the way our hands shake slightly when we talk to them. They start noticing how we grab at our hands, wringing them over and over again.

Or maybe they don’t notice it at all. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t there. That doesn’t mean it’s not killing you.

That’s when you know it’s real. When tiny things become a habit. When little habits become worry-some. When nail biting becomes a way to try to cope. When twirling hair becomes a way to scream inwardly.

You may not think it’s much. You may think that it’s not a big deal. The chewing of gum to hide the fact that you are scared to talk. The pulling on your eyelashes to hide the fact that you are anxious about a meeting you have in two months. The chattering of your teeth to hide the fact that you are petrified of getting fired. The rolling of your shoulders to attempt to hide the fact that you can’t breathe. The excessive yawning you do each day, to just take one deep breath.

You may think it’s nothing. Just like they all do.

But it is something.

And it is ruining your life.

It’s ruining your work ethic. It is ruining your social life. It is ruining your ability to communicate correctly. It’s ruining your personality. It’s ruining your self-esteem. It’s ruining your ability to stand up for yourself. It’s ruining your dating life. And it’s ruining you as a person.

Because when you have anxiety, anxiety can take over your brain. And you don’t really feel like a person at all. Just a human body full of fears. Full of worry. Full of built up emotions. And full of questions.

And when anxiety takes over, you may not know it. You may not know the seriousness of it. You may not know it has taken ahold of you. You may think it’s silly. You might even listen to those people, when they tell you it’s not a big deal. You might even listen to them, when they tell you it will go away on it’s own.

But I think you should listen to your body. Listen to yourself. Notice your body language. Notice the way your eyes shift more now. Notice the way your legs seem unable to be still. Notice the way your mind shifts to only negative thoughts. Notice the way your brain wants you to be afraid.

Please. Don’t let it ruin you. Don’t let it take over. Because unlike those people who tell you that it’s chill, I’m here to tell you that it’s not. And unlike those people who tell you that’s a piece of cake, I’m here to tell you that anxiety is a real thing. I’m here to tell you that anxiety can come from nothing, and turn into the biggest thing in your life.

And I’m here to tell you that ignoring it, will truly ruin your life. TC mark

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

For more poetry and writing follow me on Instagram!

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