How Being Selfish Will Get You Ahead Of Everyone Else (In Your Life And Career)

Amos Bar-Zeev
Amos Bar-Zeev

I’ve been spent most of my life being timid, quiet, and going with the flow. I’ve been known to apologize when nothing was actually my fault. And I’ve been known to not to stand up for myself when it was absolutely necessary to do so. I can’t even ask the barista at Starbucks for a new drink without apologizing profusely, and bowing my head down in shame.

If I were selfish all along, I wonder how much I would’ve gotten done by now. And I wonder who I would’ve been at this point in time.

I’m not telling you to be rude, to be mean or to tell people what to do. I’m not saying to disregard people when they give you advice, or to blatantly ignore individuals who try to help you. But you absolutely need to have a backbone. In your career, in your personal life and in your friendships. No matter what.

You need to be able to ask yourself who you are living for. Are you living for everyone else? To make everyone else around you happy? Or are you living for you?

I choose to live for me.

Do you think Beyonce got to where she is now by apologizing profusely for having a voice, by not standing up for what she believed in and by handing out ‘sorry’ cards for every guy she wrote about? No. Do you think anybody who is living a great life right now, cared what other people thought about them? Do you think they let people step on their toes and let other people decide the important decisions for them in life? No.

You have got to stand up for what you believe in no matter how deafening it sounds. You have got to go after what you want, and not make apologies along the way. You’ve got to shout to the rooftops that you are special, and not glance down at your hands in embarrassment.

You’ve got to believe in your abilities to succeed.

Being selfish doesn’t mean hurting people. It doesn’t mean that you are going to toss aside everyone else. But you’ve got to be selfish about who your friends are, and who you surround yourself with. You’ve got to be selfish about your job, and getting the treatment you deserve. You’ve got to be selfish about choosing your life partner, and know not to just settle for anyone.

If you want to be a singer, you’ve got to let go of the people that tell you it’s impossible. If you want to be a writer, you’ve got to give a big ‘fuck you’ to the people who tell you that you aren’t talented enough. If you want to be a doctor, you’ve got to prove to yourself that you can do it. If you want to be Instagram model for all I care, you’ve got to just go for it. And do it without an apology to anyone.

At the end of the day, the only person you are left with is yourself. At the end of the day, you have your body, your heart, and your soul. You’ll have only your hands to hold, and your own emotions and ideas in your head.

Being selfish isn’t not being considerate or kind. It’s just not letting the bullshit things that people say to you bother you. It’s not letting their jealous remarks and insults destroy your mind.

You only have this life to live. You only have this second, this minute, this month, this year, and this moment. Now is the time to be selfish in everything you do. Don’t let people tear you down. Don’t let people tell you what you can and can’t do for your enjoyment.

Don’t give other people the power to destroy your life and your dreams.

So go for what you want without an ounce of an apology or a mutter of a ‘sorry’. Go move to that city that you’ve always dreamed of living in. Go kiss that girl that you’ve always been in love with. Come out to your parents and don’t apologize for being ‘different’. Do what makes you smile like nothing ever has. Run and tell that boy you love him without being scared of his response. Do whatever makes the authentic you happy. Do whatever makes the genuine you ecstatic.

Go take that leap of faith and that leap of fate. Go celebrate yourself and celebrate this life that you have. And don’t forget to thank me later. TC mark

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

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he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

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