To All The Girls Who Are Terrified Of Love

Nick Bulanovv
Nick Bulanovv

Sweet girl, I know you’re scared to open up your heart to a foreign one you’ve never seen or felt before. And I understand that completely. It seems crazy to jump head first into something that could possibly end. It seems like it would just be easier to forget that you even feel something in the first place. Maybe if you could ignore your feelings, then you wouldn’t have to go through the beautiful mess that we all call love.

But, that’s just the thing. Love is not just a mess. It’s a beautifulgorgeous, life changing mess. It can be dirty, yes, and it also can be detrimental. But, it is worth it. No matter what. Every single time. Regardless of whether the story ends up broken or alive, it is so worth it. 

Every single person who you have loved before has taught you important lessons about what you want and what you don’t want. And that’s just a tiny part of your journey. Life is going to surprise you, I promise. And it might be five years from now or twenty years from now, but eventually you are going to find the partner that fits all of those things that you wanted all along.

Closing yourself up to love right now will not do you any good. It won’t save you from ever being hurt or ever being broken. It will do nothing but hurt you in the long run. 

So, here’s what you need to do.

When you feel those butterfly wings start to flutter in your stomach, listen.

And when your hands start to sweat whenever you see the person you like, listen. When you find yourself stuttering like an incompetent middle schooler, listen. Please listen to what your body is saying and go do something about it.  

So many times, I have hidden in fear. I have been scared of rejection. I’ve tried ignoring what my heart was telling me. And I’ve ignored what my body was telling me. But there is absolutely no reason to ignore those butterflies, that racing heart beat and those sweaty palms. Embrace it. Don’t run the opposite direction, sweet girl. You’ll regret it if you do.

I’ve only experienced love once. And even though I got hurt in the end, I still will never regret meeting him and sharing my world with him. I’ll never regret the nights we spent star gazing, the days we spent with intertwined fingers, and the years we spent loving one another. I will never regret a single day that I got to share with him.

Because it’s the closest thing to perfect that I’ve ever felt. And it was the closest thing to magic that I’ve ever been a part of.

You will get hurt in your lifetime. And when it happens, you are not going to want go on anymore. You’re going to want to give up. But sweet girl, love is the only thing that won’t let you give up. And love is the only thing that will make you get up on some mornings. Because it’s all we as human beings want. And it’s what we will eventually get.

It’s normal to be terrified of love. Everyone on this earth is. But, don’t let that fear dictate you. You deserve to experience all the magic in the world that love will give you. You deserve to kiss someone and hear their heartbeat race just like yours. You deserve the kind of love that makes you believe that good things do happen. And you deserve to know what love feels like in every crevasse of your body.

Sweet soul, your heart deserves to be held. And your heart deserves to be adored. TC mark

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

For more poetry and writing follow me on Instagram!

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You look back and you just feel stupid.
You can’t forgive yourself for falling
or believing all the lies.
You reread every text.
You relive every memory.
And it all starts making sense —
he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

“It’s just wondrous how every time I go through some emotional trauma, your posts are so relatable and it gives me so much hope. I love the writing and the photos. It’s all a pleasure to read. I can’t thank you enough for it, really.” — DM from @ThoughtCatalog Instagram follower

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