1. When you trip on the sidewalk and pretend like nothing happened because honestly, it happens to you at least three times a day.
2. Dropping your phone on your face is part of your daily routine.
3. Needing to buy an ugly ass Otter Box for your phone because you’ve cracked the screen more times than you can count.
4. When people think you’re drunk but in reality, you’re just wearing heels.
5. You never wear white and always always regret it when you do.
6. You frequently have night terrors about spilling champagne on your wedding dress.
7. You were that kid in middle school that spilled their tray full of food all over the floor.
8. Your spirit animal is Jennifer Lawrence at every Oscar show.
9. Eating a hamburger is the riskiest task ever. You won’t even bother with the ketchup.
10. Waking up with bruises all over your body doesn’t even phase you anymore.
11. Trying to dance is like trying to solve an algebra problem for you. It just never looks right.
12. You frequently question how good of a mother you would be because everything you touch seems to fall or break in half.
13. You have broken at least five bones in your body so far.
14. Life is a giant obstacle course for you. Every day is a god damn miracle.
15. Memories from the past make you cringe more than smile.
16. Whenever you see anyone else fall in public, you silently pray for their well being because of all people, you know what it’s like.
17. You get prescribed anti-anxiety medicine because you can’t stop having panic attacks thinking about tripping down the aisle on your wedding day… You haven’t even met your husband yet.
18. Trying to hug someone without being awkward as f*ck is not possible for you.
19. When anyone mentions “ice skating”, you run the other direction. Fast.
20. You’ve already had the epiphany that you will never be that flawless girl who walks around with a coffee cup looking like Jessica Alba.
21. When you get asked to be a bridesmaid and you’re the only one who has to wear ballet flats.
22. The best gift you’ve ever received was a sippy cup.
23. Ballet class when you were a kid was your own version of hell.
24. When you fall off the escalator during your first real kiss on your first real date. Guilty.