19 Things I’ve Learned In 100 Days Of Isolation

Other than brief encounters with cashiers at grocery stores, delivery drivers while ordering takeout, and the people behind the counter at the pharmacy (much thanks to all of the people aforementioned), I have lived the past 100 days in total isolation with zero in-person human contact. Here are 19 things I’ve learned from it.

1. In the United States, toilet paper competes for first place (alongside, you know, maybe water) in the list of necessities for an emergency. I guess we think that shit will save our asses.

2. Invest in a comfortable chair. (This goes along with the importance of toilet paper and having a happy ass.)

3. Life is more fulfilling with a hobby. Netflix doesn’t count. Get off of your happy ass, and do something.

4. When you don’t feel like doing something because it will take a lot of time, that time is going to pass by anyway. So just start chipping away at it.

5. Most things are temporary.

6. A lot of people don’t actually give a fuck about you.

7. Some do. You’ll know.

8. Hold onto the ones that do.

9. Being a cat would be kinda boring, but at least you don’t have to work for your food and someone always cleans up after you.

10. If I were a cat, my favorite part would be all the naps I could take.

11. When you think you can’t do something, try doing it anyway. At best, you prove yourself wrong. At worst, you prove yourself right.

12. Every adversity comes with an opportunity.

13. Things can always be worse.

14. That being said, it’s not an absurd idea to plan for a zombie apocalypse.

15. Apple’s Face ID feature is really inconvenient during a pandemic.

16. Gratitude. Gratitude. Gratitude. It has the power to transform “bad” into “okay”, “okay” into “good”, “good” into “great”, and so on and so forth.

17. No, you’re not missing a puzzle piece. Check in the crevices of that comfortable chair you should have invested in.

18. It’s very possible to lose a cup of coffee. And it’s probably in the microwave. You should probably check there before checking under the bed. (Yes, this actually happened to me. And yes, I checked under the bed for a cup of coffee.)

19. You can’t change the past. The future is all fiction and speculation. So all you really have is the present moment. Make it count, and don’t worry too much about yesterday or tomorrow.