Every Millennial at some point in his or her life went to the Apple store and with a slight embarrassment downloaded Tinder.
“It is just for fun to check what is out there.” Yeah yeah, I am not judging.
I’ve been a heavy Tinder user for quite some time. I didn’t have a need for a random hook up. I decided to see if I can actually find a guy who I can call Boyfriend Material. After some “research” I can share with my fellow ladies some tips on how to spot a decent gentlemen in the pile of douchebags.
First of all — you need to know what you are looking for and what you can offer. Only if you’ll make yourself presentable you can expect others not to see you as a one night stand. Upload some pictures with a bit more clothes on and with a decent background (NO BIG CLEAVAGE OR DRUNK PARTY PICTURES). Add some text in your bio, which should consist of a short but catchy resumé with some highlights of your life. Mention where you study or work, maybe volunteer. Be funny, but don’t overdue with emojis as they automatically will make you look dumb, trust me.
Great profile? Check.
Now let’s move on to the part we all been waiting for: How to see who has a potential and whose picture should be swiped left straight away. This part can be divided into two pieces. The first we can call “Swiping decisions” and a second one – “The right questions” .
Just a look at his picture can already tell you what is this guy’s deal.
1. If he’s shirtless (abs, tanned, etc.) in the picture — swipe left without any further thinking. You don’t need some narcissist in your life, trust me.
2. Big group of male friends in a club or at a party — frat boys are sooo freshman year. They will care more about banging your hot sister, than about meeting your parents.
3. Dirty mirror selfie / messy room in the background — unless you want to be his personal cleaning lady slash girlfriend, save yourself a trouble and skip this one.
4. Nice suit / polo shirt — some potential already, especially if it looks like it’s his everyday outfit, not once-in-a-year-mother’s-birthday outfit.
5. Clean shaved and nice haircut — yes, hell, yes!
6. Well written bio which doesn’t indirectly say “I am looking for a one night stand”.
The right questions
Ok, so you already have some matches and you get the first message saying something like “Hey, how are you?”. That’s where the real action comes in. Do not, I repeat — DO NOT waist time while talking about some nonsense like what music do you like or what movies you prefer. He can love Frank Sinatra and Casablanca, but he also might be 27 and still living with his parents.
All you need to remember is TWO QUESTIONS — What do you do? and What are your hobbies?
That’s it. From these two questions you can find out all essential information needed to make your verdict if this guy is a good Boyfriend Material. By finding out what he does you get the key to the Holy Grail — you can see his ambitions. You don’t want to end up having three kids from the dude who thinks working as a bartender in the club is his highest career peak. The same goes with hobbies. Remember, Dear, meeting friends, watching Netflix or listening to music IS NOT A HOBBY. Sport, books, art, music, volunteering — that is just a small part of decent hobbies, which every person should have. If the guy doesn’t have any extra curriculum activity — that means he will spend all his time drinking or playing video games. And both of these types in the end will consume all the time which should be spent with their girlfriend.
To sum up, there are quite a few rules you can follow that will reduce your chance from going the wrong direction. But keep in mind, that in the end, you are the only one responsible for your own future. So make that next swipe wisely.