40 Things I’d Rather Share An Office With Than My Co-Worker

1. A lizard

2. Three cranky old men who keep getting told the price of everyday items in 2012

3. A snowman

4. Janice from Friends

5. A small car fire

6. Someone who deliberately Gchats to people whenever their red lights are on as a joke

7. Snooky’s poof

8. A cloud of chalk dust

9. Barfing ghoul

10. A woman singing the entire Glee soundtrack to herself while holding her ear

11. Tuna sandwich

12. A painting of Joseph Stalin

13. The meth lab on Breaking Bad

14. The sound of a 1940s radio news alert

15. Someone stuck in a permanent Elvis impersonation

16. King Joffrey

17. An 11-year-old’s shin guards

18. Freddy Kruger

19. An American who writes the date British-style

20. Dirty diaper

21. A haunted grandfather clock

22. Seven dogs who won’t stop barking

23. A bucket of the toxic liquid collected from between the subway tracks

24. Old boombox blasting a cassette of the song “Puerto Rico” by Frankie Cutlass that was previously taped off the radio

25. Gargamel

26. The cast of The View “discussing” a hot-button issue

27. A fire extinguisher that’s deploying

28. Cup of urine

29. All the pundits. All of them.

30. Tosh.O

31. A group of people fighting about baseball statistics

32. Swamp water

33. The band from the Freecreditreport.com commercials

34. Voldemort

35. A swinging thurible full of incense

36. Apple Maps

37. Someone whose hands are liquid

38. Bain

39. A person trying to explain to their parents how to create an email attachment over the phone

40. Rat king