We try our best to offer sympathy, even if it’s not real, only because we know brutal honesty and valid advice to stop messing with his scumbag ass won’t work this time around. If it didn’t work the first time or even the tenth time, the best way to show your dear friend that you care is to answer her sobbing Saturday night, 1 am phone calls by dropping whatever you were doing and making your way over to his house to pick her up. After the first couple months of ignored pleas for her to realize she doesn’t deserve to put up with his douchebaggery, you come to a realization that the best you can do as a friend is to sit by her side and let her cry through her misery. This all became weekly routine for my friend and I, as did his apocryphal apologies my friend pathetically ate up every damn time.
I didn’t know who to feel worse for. The manipulative jerk who we’ll refer to as “Zach,” his girlfriend he constantly cheated on, or his side bitches which is what my friend was. Zach’s girlfriend will claim they’ve been dating for over 5 years when there have been numerous times Zach paraded around with his supposed single status. His girlfriend was completely aware of his ways. She may very well be unofficially diagnosed as a Stockholm syndrome slut too, considering the countless times she took him back after being cheated on and lied to. She’s either proudly representing the concept of unconditional love or she’s just fucking stupid.
We’ll refer to my friend as “Angela.” We’ve all heard about girls having “daddy issues.” These girls are made jokes of and looked down upon because they’re typically assumed to be clinically crazy whores. Angela properly defined the phrase with her lifestyle. In fact, she embraced her daddy issues and she would openly admit her insanity to provide her bad decisions some sort of justice. Angela’s childhood lacked of her father’s affection he tried to express fiscally instead. This absence of attention led to a void she began to fill by accepting lust driven attention from various boys.
Angela turned hooking up into a sport with the goal to be listed at the top of high scores. One time, out of boredom and curiosity, we both made a list of all the guys we’ve been sexually involved with. We were both 19 at the time. I was hesitant to share my shameful number of 12 only for the embarrassment to dissipate when Angela beat me with a figure doubled mine, knowing she was probably missing some. It was as if she was showcasing me her bullet pointed list as trophy fucks. Most of the boys were those who only wanted sex and nothing more. I’m sure at some point in Angela’s sexual career, she convinced herself that’s all she wanted as well. This is actually the best thing to do to protect yourself from your heart being harmed.
When Zach came along, he made no mention of a significant other leaving Angela struck with the hope of pursuing him as a boyfriend. Zach had his manipulative way of luring in the ladies. Prior to Angela becoming a victim, I had already known about how deceiving he could be. When Angela updated me with her first risqué rendezvous, I tried my best to warn her. Two weeks hadn’t passed until Angela came to me with mascara infused tears streaming down her face leaving faint charcoal colored streaks. A photo Zach was tagged in on Facebook is what did it. A photo captioned with how loved and lucky Zach’s girlfriend felt.
As hurt as Angela felt, she continued to cater to Zach’s booty calls knowing she was just a side bitch. When I’d question why she would help Zach cheat on his girlfriend, I could always see through whatever bullshit response she’d come up with. She liked to think that it meant something important when Zach would choose to spend a night with her rather than his girlfriend. When Angela wasn’t fucking Zach, she’d still do her usual thing of playing “hello titty” with random strangers at the bar; the drinks purchased as a confirmation of the anticipated one night stand later in the night. Angela would deny it but she undoubtedly developed an emotional attachment which sadly, was not mutual. I knew she was just waiting for Zach to confess his true love, a confession that was never going to happen. I also knew she thought that Zach’s knowledge of her promiscuous behavior would provoke him to try to claim and tame her.
Angela welcomed her emotional abuse, she allowed herself to be a victim in his ploy of sinful joy. Being a recovering Stockholm Syndrome Slut myself, I could make an accurate assumption as to how Angela may have felt. It’s the thrill of the attention that reels girls like us in. But sometimes it’s possible to get yourself tangled in a mess of denying emotions and forcing numbness upon yourself. Once you’re far too deep, a stubborn Stockholm Syndrome Slut won’t accept guidance and advice and a friend can only stay by her side and accept that as time progresses, she’ll have to figure out how to come to her senses and get through it in a way of her own.
A moment of silence for…Daddy issues and Stockholm Syndrome Sluts.