11 Reasons Why People Insist On Crushing Your Dreams And Making You Believe You’ll Fail

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Reasons That Have To Do With You

1. You think you are more talented than most people and think that you’ll be the exception to everything and have more originality than those who have “made it” in a creative field.

Even though recognizing that life is too short to live miserably under someone else’s agenda is good and well, there is also reality to consider. Most people cannot get by on talent or originality alone. It is very difficult to make it in creative fields or anything that is subjective because being better than average at something doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll succeed in the way most people define success. The popular people that you believe are untalented made it because they happen to be at the right place at the right time with the people that have a lot of power and influence to promote them, but these are exceptions, not the rule, and being like them isn’t what you should be aiming for. And the most brutally honest of critics want you to know that truly pursuing your passion for the sake of your intrinsic longing to create requires a healthy dose of skepticism along with a great deal of humility and the willingness to do the work for the sake of your own soul, not for the sake of having your ego stroked or idolized by others. All things that are done for the sake of satisfying the ego are fleeting and aiming for popularity is the surest way to prevent your inherent creativity from springing forth in the most natural and genuine way possible.

2. You probably believe that passion is all it takes to succeed, that you can manifest inspiration from thin air, and that doing whatever the f*ck you want will make you happy, regardless of the consequences.

Even though intrinsic motivation and genuine self-expression will yield more creative and soulful works than focusing solely on producing what will generate the most profit, you need to consider that living a creative life is not all roses, sunshine, or sweet fires of passion burning in your heart. There will be days when you feeling like quitting if nobody is clapping for you or when difficult life circumstances get in the way. Passion is as fickle as your feelings, inspiration isn’t magical, and chasing after temporary whims will only lead to nowhere. The truth is, living a genuinely creative life is all about building up yourself, having a concrete purpose, keeping an audience in mind, creating something that will help others as much as yourself, and persevering, even when it feels like people don’t seem to care for what you’re doing.

3. You have unrealistic expectations for yourself.

As creative, you probably are sick to death of hearing the most trite and unsolicited piece of advice, “You need to be more realistic.” But there is some truth in these words and being skeptical and critical of yourself is an act of self-awareness. You need to know your limits, be prepared to change your plans if something goes wrong, understand how your circumstances can deter you from reaching your goals, and use the knowledge of these things to make a reasonable plan that will facilitate your growth – a strategic and forward-thinking plan that neither sets you up for disappointment nor caves into the pressure of resigning your creative self for the sake of short-term survival.

4. You rarely follow through on any of your plans. You have difficulty organizing your life and aren’t consistent enough to show that you can sustain the work that you want to pursue.

You may have a reputation for being the one that talks about the grand plans that you have for your life and how you would theoretically get there (in very generic and simplistic steps that are not simple to implement in real life), but anyone who has known you for a long time probably sees that you haven’t even started any of the great things you want to do. You might perceive certain people in your life as arrogant for belittling you, but the majority of people who do criticize you aren’t trying to be mean – they just want you to realize that having a consistent work schedule and be more organized will help you more than just daydreaming about life without actually living it or taking any actions to get there. Or they might be trying to tell you that you may need to adjust your goals so that they are more achievable. If this is the case, you have to prove that you are more than just someone who talks and daydreams all day.

Reasons That Have To Do With Them

5. They are probably working at a job they despise just to pay the bills and/or take care of their family, and they hate it when people are defying conventional norms and chasing after what they want in life.

Hateful people like to hate on others who are brave enough to live their truth and defy all social norms that bind people to a system that values profit over purpose, comfort over creativity, and the external over the internal. Some people like to hate on you because that’s in their nature, a result of living a mundane life, which they chose out of the pressure to gain the approval of others and the comforts that come with it.

6. They fear for your physical wellbeing and also fear that you’ll be unhappy and dependent on them when you fail.

They aren’t used to people going out and forging their own paths, so they fear what they don’t and assume that failure is the only result outside of following a predictable and safe life path. They fear for your life of pursuing the unknown more than they fear for their own lives for being stuck in the daily grind of struggling for survival.

7. They are easily offended whenever you express any belief that is contrary to theirs.

It is in our animalistic nature to be offended when anyone expresses thoughts, ideas, and beliefs that are contrary to our own, but those who depend upon others’ approval for survival will be more offended than those who have conviction to say what they believe in without caring about how others perceive them or if they even like them. The people that criticize you and insist on crushing your dreams are the ones who hold their own beliefs as truths and yours as dangerous lies that threaten their existence, reputation, and superiority. They want you to believe what they believe because it gives them an ego boost and the opportunity to control you how you think, how you perceive the world, and how you live in a way that they think is a guarantee for safety and prosperity.

8. They place more value on the external than the internal. They treat others perceptions of you like gold and treat your inner self like worthless trash that means nothing if you don’t portray yourself in a way that’s profitable to them.

They want you to look good for them because they care too much about how others think about you. They want to have the chance to brag about you when you meet certain societal standards that are held in high regard (how you dress, what kind of job you have, how much money you make, how busy you look, what material possessions you have, how well you socialize with others, etc.), but if you don’t do these things, they’ll be angry and disappointed with you, not because they truly care about you, but because their egos can’t be praised for being connected to a version of you that they like better than the real you. It looks bad to them if you don’t succeed in a traditional sense. However, that doesn’t matter because in the end, whatever is external will be forgotten, but the internal, the truest self within you that others don’t see or recognize as real will remain, long after they desert you for someone else who happens to pursue the temporary things of society.

Reasons That Have To Do With How the World Is

9. In this world, survival is dependent upon how well you cooperate in this existing socioeconomic system, how easily you adapt to others’ plans, and how well you can prove that you are useful to others.

There are many people around the world that are born to unfortunate circumstances and have no chances of escape, through no fault of their own because that’s the only way they’ve been taught how to survive. There are many people in this country who depend upon their tedious (and often miserable) jobs to sustain them or else they’d lose their families and everything they own. This is the sad truth about how the world is. The majority of people depend on those who control the socioeconomic system and have the power to cut people off if they aren’t useful enough or meet certain standards that are set in place for the sole purpose of making profit. Thus, in this system, it is very difficult to create your own path in life and do so in a way that doesn’t betray your soul, simply because of the way things are and how the herd mentality is ingrained in most people from birth to death.

10. In this world, very few people have the time, energy, and attention span to care about whether you make it or not.

It is unrealistic to expect millions of people to care about us. Even if you pour your heart and soul out into the work you do, don’t expect everyone to care because not everyone thinks your work is relevant, nor do people have the time to even glance at the work you’re doing because there are so many things competing for their attention. That’s just the way it is. The secret to dealing with this is to focus on creating for the type of people who are more likely to care about your work and resonate with the message that you believe is not expressed enough in the world.

11. Those who are connected to super powerful and influential people in society will be promoted and praised more in the industry.

But don’t get discouraged because numbers and accolades aren’t everything in life. It may seem like those who control the media are crushing your dreams, but they want to promote things that sell well, and why would you want to gain the approval of those who only seek to make money off of you and enslave you to their expectations anyway?

Create your own work and share it with those who truly care for your soul and love the genuine self that the majority don’t understand, and your life will be more rewarding and full of the kind of joy that transcends the superficial means that people use to evaluate your worth. Even if your dreams get crushed, create anyway, but always remember to equip your passions with the purpose, endurance, and resilience they need to break through the stones of cynicism so they can better sustain you and help you thrive and transport you to where you need to be. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Poet, sci-fi/fantasy writer, music lover, composer, & INFP.

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