How To Softly Choose Closure

In this world, we are from time to time given the opportunity to close a large chapter of our life. You may be at the precipice of ending a relationship, close to a graduation, about to quit your job of many years, or in my case almost finished writing a book you poured your heart and soul into. Our society has fostered a millennial generation that idolizes a grinding culture of meticulous documentation… So what do we do when there is nothing left to post?

If you are anything like me, the moment of closure is dizzying. I am standing at the edge of a brink, with nowhere to run. When you are given a rare moment of closure, how do you move through the experience? To the detriment of today’s society, most of us feel as though we have to end every major life event with a “season finale.” If the ending isn’t brighter than the journey, was it even worth the effort?

Let me tell you, this school of thought has got to change. Most of us when standing at the edge of that brink become different people. We transform into an increasingly emotional and irrational person when we should be celebrating our hard-fought efforts. All of a sudden that major event coming to a close is overshadowed by negative emotions that quickly spiral out of control. How many of us have been unable to remember why we fell in love with a toxic significant other? How many students’ fear of joining the real world has cast an ill shadow on what should have been a jovial graduation? Or in my case, how could I forget how enjoyable a process writing my book was? I realized I had become so caught up in constructing a magnificent conclusion, that I had lost my story altogether.

We must embrace our past experience, reflect on our memories sincerely, and set our sight on the next road. But never forget that before we move on it is okay to stand at the end of that towering cliff. I urge you to remember you don’t have to jump. You don’t have to take a photo. You don’t have to find anything bigger or better. Sometimes when you slow down and take a seat at the end of that soaring cliff you will notice a small, hidden path in the brush that will gently guide you back to the road of life. These small paths are often hard to see, so take a second and soak in your surroundings. The conclusion of your relationship, job, marriage or whatever it might be does not have to be graceful. All endings are the start of a new beginning. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Lane Farrell is a resident of Manhattan that enjoys spending her time running, reading, and laughing.

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