10 Modern-Day Rugrats Episodes, If They Were Actually All Grown Up

Back in 2001, the Rugrats were All Growed Up — a TV movie that was successful enough to launch a 5 year spinoff series, which chronicled Tommy and the gang’s early teenage years. In the interest of wasting everyone’s time, here’s how some episodes might shake out if the Rugrats were still going strong today — as 25-ish year-olds, just tryna make it in the big city:

1. Tommy must take on his apartment’s neglectful landlord, who refuses to provide Tommy’s building with hot water. After years of having a constantly upset stomach, Chuckie finds out he’s gluten-free.

2. Angelica spends hours on photoshop devising a fake vacation, which she puts on instagram in the hopes of making all of her friends jealous. The only person who “likes” her pictures is Grandpa Lou.

3. Phil, a Jackass-type comedian, is offered to host a Man vs. Food type show. Susie, his agent, realizes how badly the network is taking advantage of him, and they resolve to start their own, independently produced show. Fittingly, it’s centered around worms.

4. Chuckie and Chazz Finster enter a Father/Son modeling competition. They lose to two mustaschioed cowboys, who turn out to be Phil and Howard.

5. Charlotte Pickles takes a yoga class with a prospective client, in order to try and get her business. The class completely changes her life, and she quits her job to embark on a long-ignored spiritual journey. The client signs and Charlotte abruptly goes back to work.

6. Dill uses Tommy’s old ID to get into bars underage. Whilst out with Kimmy around town, they run into Stu and Drew. Stu ends up passed out at a 7-11, drooling over pork rinds, and Dill must figure out a way to get Stu home without Didi noticing.

7. A picture of Grandpa snoring goes viral, which he milks through a series of public appearances — most of which, he falls asleep in the middle of. After his viral sensation becomes old news two days later, Grandpa lectures to Tommy that back in his day, people used to get FIFTEEN minutes of fame — rather than the 30 seconds of notoriety that exists today.

8. Stu has high hopes for a new invention, which he labors day and night over. He finally reveals the end product at an inventor’s expo, which he describes as “a place where people could create profiles and connect on the internet.” Nobody has the heart to tell him about Facebook.

9. Angelica matches with Timmy McNulty on Tinder. They get along really well, and start dating. They invite their siblings/family members to a house party one night, and end up engaging in a (beer) lympics. Things get heated, and Timmy and Angelica decide they’re better off as friends.

10. Tommy spends an entire day on hold with his cable provider to dispute an erroneous charge, because an adult’s gotta do what an adult’s gotta do. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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