Trends are deemed as such because they’re ephemeral in nature. That said, here are some that would be rather entertaining to see come around the block again:
Good Charlotte, New Found Glory, Taking Back Sunday, Yellowcard. Music naturally needs to evolve to survive, but the movement that spurned out of pop-punk (I would argue electro-pop primarily–3OH!3, Cobra Starship, Metro Station), always felt a lot more aspirational than it did grounded in (albeit, angsty) substance. Few music genres tell like it is better than what pop-punk managed to do collectively.
“Bringing back” pop-punk would be more sad than anything (like going to your favorite college bar after graduation), but the ethos of the movement seems ripe for a second life.
2. Mad Men Lunches
Instead of dicking around for 80% of the time between 9-6, why don’t we just dick around for 40% of the time until 1 30, go to lunch for 3 hours, and then spend the remaining 90 minutes watching YouTube videos while waiting for the buzz to wear off?
3. Phatfarm, Southpole, Ecko
At the middle school that I went to, people who wore these brands were rather “popular,” and overall highly desirous within the fourteen year-old socio-cultural hierarchy.
When the popularity of these brands waned, many these same people found themselves exploring the depths of hard drugs whilst proudly dropping out of community college. Clearly, the change in outfit.
Exorbitantly useless, goes great with a fanny pack, and brimming with irony–the holy trifecta for hipster exploitation.
Therefore, we should treat beepers the way progressive Moms treat weed–not for the cultural worth, but for the clear economic value.
In a world where everyone’s trying to #makeit, it’s sometimes difficult to distinguish those who we should and shouldn’t associate with.
JNCOS conveniently expedited the natural selection process, with approximately zero high-horse backlash from the blogosphere. Society may never again be presented with such a gift.
A style of dance that reached its peak in the mid-2000s, krumping is predicated on free and exaggerated body movements. In dance form, krumping is truly the ultimate expression of self:
In decline, I’d argue, partially due to the hyper-critical nature of internet culture. Expressing your true self is dangerous–people will make snarky comments and deem you as illegitimate.
7. Carlos Santana
The man was a Billboard chart assassin in his heyday. What’s he been doing?
The man is definitely long overdue for some serious recognition. Just imagine what eating at Chipotle would be like with a fiery new Carlos Santana single sizzling in the background.
8. The Flip (Male Hairstyle)
I recall going to my first middle school dance. It was a Friday night, and my mom thought it was a big deal so I had a haircut scheduled a few hours prior. “The flip” was in, so I went for the flip. I did not successfully connect with the girl my friend Brendan said had a huge crush on me (Phoebe, are you reading this?), but that’s clearly because the flip made me way too intimidating to approach.
9. Hawaiian Shirts
I’m pretty sure I also wore a hawaiian shirt to that same dance. Unbuttoned, white t-shirt underneath. Just a hurricane of 12 year-old exuberance.
Luckily, this wish that all of us clearly share may very well be coming true. Reports from a recent Las Vegas retail industry trade show suggest that there’s been enough Hawaiian shirt buzz to manufacture a trend that doesn’t yet exist. This is how it’s done.