You fall for them and it feels nothing like you thought it would.
You have fallen in love before. You’ve felt loves that started out small and the ambushed you out of left field. You’ve had the quiet loves and the loud ones. You’ve had the adrenaline rushes and the soft whispers. You think you’ve experienced it all.
And then, you fall in love, and this time you don’t even realize you’re falling.
It’s like gravity has vanished, it doesn’t exist here. You know you have time to love them and you take it, every second of it. You’re floating, you’re in a pause. You feel like time hasn’t stopped, but it has finally come around and decided to be on your side for once. You love the way you can wake up in the morning and know he will be there. You love the way that you don’t take this for granted and still give him all the adoration and affection you can conjure up- this time it’s from a place of want, not a bargaining chip for them to stick around another night.
It’s like meeting another best friend, and learning everything about them is not something to rush through to get to the good part. These are the good parts. These are the moments that you will recall in a few months when it’s their birthday, or the week he has an awful day and you know exactly what to do to make them feel better. It’s the knowledge that you know them—really know them—and yet you never want to stop learning more- because you know you have time.
It’s like the fear of not having them forever has disappeared, not because you have a guarantee that they will be there, but because you feel confident enough to know that they will be here for a long time. You can sense that the feeling you have is mutual, and you know it because of the way they show you.
It’s the moment when you start acting like yourself when they’re in the room. It’s when you don’t stop being goofy when they look at you and laugh. It’s the way they act goofy with you and you kiss them on the mouth afterwards because you know what it’s life to be shamed for this kind of silliness, this kind of openness, and you cherish the laughter and joy that they have when they’re with you.
It’s the moment when you fight and you have no desire to walk away, you’re only goal is to fix things. Not because you can’t live without them, but because my god, you don’t want to. Your pride and your stubbornness take a back seat, your need to be right goes out the window. You fight, and you talk, and you compromise until things are okay again.
Because that’s what you do when you love someone. You don’t stop trying to fix things.
It’s the moment when they look over at you, and maybe you don’t feel butterflies flying around in your stomach, but what you do feel is happy. You know that this isn’t a love that you’re used to- the kind that stays without begging, adores without restraint, holds on when it’s easier to let go. You aren’t as worried about tomorrow as you used to be, because right now is so, so good.
It’s the moment when they learn all the things about you in your past- all the things that you would love to erase and rewrite- and they don’t run away from it. They take it in and maybe even have to process it, but they also know the person you used to be isn’t the person you are now. It means they love you- mistakes and all. It doesn’t mean they won’t inspire or push you to be a better version of yourself, but they still don’t believe that your past should directly affect your present.
It’s the moment that you recognize that while timing doesn’t necessarily determine whether a relationship works or it doesn’t- yet for the first time that you can remember, it isn’t standing in your way, and in fact it almost could convince you that it pushed you together, almost as if even the universe itself is rooting for you.
It’s the moment when you know, even right now, that this love will be one you will remember for the ages. One you will always hold close to your heart.
The one that stood out among the rest.