You know, it’s rather amusing to think about; waiting for your future spouse. Waiting.
I’ve never been a patient human being. I see something, I like it, I want it, I go after it. I never really understood or placed much value in waiting for something. If I could get it, then why wait?
Growing up in church, I’ve heard more than my fair share of sermons, lectures, and advice on the value of waiting for my future husband-In multiple senses. That I should wait for him physically by saving myself until I’m married and only sharing my body with my husband. That I should be waiting for him emotionally, by not pouring out my heart to guys and sharing so much of my soul with them. Waiting for him spiritually, where I sit by and not go around dating anyone who 1. Isn’t a Christian and 2. Doesn’t have a compatible future with me. You do a lot of waiting and a lot of searching-a lot of daydreaming and a lot of hoping. It’s all well intentioned and in ways not a bad idea. Yet when you tell an impatient girl to wait, do you know what happens?
She waits…until she doesn’t.
See, God knows the desires of my heart. Among those being that I want a whole hearted, long term committed, God-centered kind of love. Along the way to trying to achieve this goal, I have settled for relationships with boys who only gave me half of their interest. Or guys who didn’t want anything serious-something that would take minimal effort. Or who were in a decent place with their relationship with God, but not quite where they wanted to be. I’ve told myself this was okay, that this was acceptable, and that someday this would all work out if I just keep “waiting”. I’ve sat around and waited for a guy to come into my life, hands folded on my lap, trying not to reveal how impatient I was for the right one to come along. I’ve passed the time, putting my life on pause, believing I couldn’t start a future until God brought the guy into my life I would spend forever with.
Well I hate to break it to everyone, but I’m done waiting.
See, God also knows that I have more desires in my heart than wanting a spouse. This by no means is a bad thing-God created marriage, the desire to want love and to give love. Yet I have other desires too. I want to be a youth pastor. I want to travel. I desire to learn more, become more, and ultimately do more of whatever it is God would call me to do.
So as you can see, I have a little more on my plate than simply waiting on Christian Prince Charming to arrive. I’ve got plans and I’ve got dreams that are finally starting to take off. So despite the fact that I really would like to meet this guy, I’m not going to sit here and wait until he shows up before I start the rest of my life. I just don’t have time to hang around hoping it will come before I do anything else. When that time does come, I won’t be sitting waiting for him. I’ll be running to where God has me going next.
Let’s just hope he can keep up.