Just So You Know, It’s Okay To Not Be Okay

I have loved and I have lost.

My heart has been broken not once, not twice, but enough times to realize that it’s okay to hurt. It’s okay to miss them and talk about their little quirks with your friends. It’s okay to look at their display picture, type a message and delete it. It is okay to listen to old, rusty breakup songs, and cry yourself to sleep. It’s okay.

It’s okay to repeat scenarios in your head and look for signs of trouble that you missed. It’s okay to stain your pillow, crying out his name into the darkness of the night. It’s okay to be confused and forlorn. Believe me, it’s okay.

You know why? Because it makes you human.

Because of that sinking feeling in your chest when the one you love tells you that he or she can’t be with you anymore, that feeling makes you hit rock bottom. When it feels like someone ripped your whole body apart and smashed your heart into a million pieces, that my friend, is the sting of love.

Because when someone breaks your heart and you are inconsolable, you learn about yourself more than ever. You discover how strong you actually are. You may find shoulders to cry on, you may be told that there is plenty fish in the sea, you may also be told that you need to get out there, but you search for comfort from the one who broke you. And then you realize that you have to be your own hero.

So you wake up in the morning, make a resolution to let bygones be bygones and start afresh. By the end of the day, you are exhausted and only in his memories, you find solace. Day by day and piece by piece, you pick up your broken heart, in the hope of it being whole one day. Not brand new, but healed.

Until one day, when you open your eyes, stare at the ceiling and let your lips curl into a smile. Your heart doesn’t feel so heavy anymore. Getting out of bed isn’t so difficult anymore. His name is not in your head anymore and you feel…normal.

That day you feel like you fought a battle and conquered your demons. That day you discover a new sense of freedom, a newfound strength in your insecurities and a fresher perspective of life. You finally realize that all you really needed was time.

So, darling, take your time. Take all the time you need. You deserve it.