Most of us are blessed with family and friends to love and loving or befriending yourself may sound sad to some or selfish to others. The truth is it ensures you’re a happier person and also makes you a little more selfless towards others. After all, only a jug that’s full itself can water the plants it lives with. Of what use is an empty jug? These are some of the small ways you can learn to be your own best friend. (No, it’s not a list of take yourself to the movies or have a meal alone, although I must admit those feel pretty great too!)
1. Find a solo hobby
Whether you enjoy singing songs or writing lyrics or dancing alone or playing a solo sport, it is really important to have something you can unwind with just by yourself. This helps you break away from the rest of the world for a bit and tune in to yourself. It also gives you the relief of knowing that you can enjoy yourself when you have time on your hands, without having to depend on someone else’s schedule.
2. Be honest with yourself
I know this sounds like an easy one but people are lying to themselves more often that you’d think. We tend to lie about why we can’t make it for that run or why we got upset with a friend or why we haven’t committed to that new business idea yet. Just like in all other relationships, it is crucial to have complete honesty with yourself because if you don’t have all the right information about your feelings and needs and wants and mistakes, then how will you ever give yourself the right advice? So next time, admit to yourself that you aren’t going for that run because you don’t want to go to bed earlier not because you think it’s too hot.
3. Expect excellence not perfection
It is healthy to set your goals high not just in terms of your career or your partner but also with respect to becoming a better person with each passing day. You must aim to fulfill that dream but don’t expect yourself to never fail on the path to it. You can aim to look like the best version of yourself but don’t expect yourself to never gain weight or lose hair or have spots. You must truly remember that you can be an amazing human being and expect yourself to be one but you will still be human.
4. Talk to yourself
I know we often hear that only crazy people talk to themselves but I beg to differ. To the contrary, I believe the happiest and most successful people often talk to themselves. And I don’t just mean in the mind. This could be by way of writing a journal or by having a conversation out loud. This little activity really helps you understand how you feel and deconstruct those feelings to guide you to better decisions. You are your most trusted critic and cheerleader.
5. Choose yourself
Lastly and most importantly, choose yourself. You know how we say that we must choose our partner every day. I believe in the same way we must also choose ourselves every single day. And that means choosing the family you’re born with, the love you found or didn’t find, the friends you made, the way you look, the talents you were born with or learned along the way, the mistakes you’ve made and basically choose your life. There should be no one else you’d rather be because at the end of the day, there is only one you and no one can ever love him/her more than you can.