To The One Who Got Away: This Is Me Letting You Go

woman standing in garden
Maxime Gauthier

This is me moving on from you, my “the one that got away.”

This is me moving on from every smile, laugh, and all the good times we ever had together.

This is me moving on from all the times you held my hand and asked me to stay.

I stayed,

Even when you were the first one to leave.

I don’t even know if I could ever call you my own, maybe because I have always been yours but it never felt like you were mine.

This is me moving on from your eyes and how they light up every time I call your name.

This is me moving on from your crazy ideas and corny jokes.

This is me moving on from all the times you pushed me away.

I stayed,

Even after there’s already someone else holding your hand.

This is me moving on and deleting all our pictures and all the memories I kept when you were here.

This me erasing you standing beside me in the future while we travel the world hand in hand; I’m sorry but I have to.

This is me letting you go.

It may seem unfair to know that I am slowly reformatting my whole life and entirely removing every piece of you in every part of me, but being trapped in a room where I am the only one still loving and hoping while you are out there having the best days of your life is a little too much for me.

This is me finally choosing myself after days turn months to years of choosing you.

This is me not letting myself get away.

This is me finally closing the chapter of my life when we were still fantasizing what and how we would be 10 years from now.

You’re not even here right at this moment.

I am finally accepting the fact that your leaving is not a mistake and you will never be here again buzzing up my phone when I wake up.

No more.

No more saying hello just to end up with another goodbye.

No more saying goodbye, this is the last time.

My “The One That Got Away,” I am moving on. TC mark

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