To The Women Who Have Been Told They’re ‘Too Much’

girl by neon with a lollipop
Rafael Romero

A friend of mine posted an article on Facebook a few months ago, dedicated to women who have been told they’re “too much.” I immediately laughed and shared the link on my own Facebook page, which only a select few understood.

It takes a special woman to truly understand the sentiment of being told you’re “too much.”

Having a strong personality poses its own challenges, whether it’s in the workplace, the dating world, at family gatherings, or in the comments section of any website (I should probably be banned from any news site in my hometown). I enjoy a good debate, sarcasm, and using my wit to outsmart people when they’re being mean. Hey, I might as well use my gifts for good! (again, usually in the comments section)

Over the years I’ve also had many perfectly good dates fail to text me back, tell me my stories are hard to follow, my life confuses them, or that I’m “different.” I took it personally for a (very long) while, but I’ve come to learn it’s a compliment.

I wouldn’t want to be like everyone else… and I would much rather find someone who appreciates me for me.

Being “too much” weeds people out quickly, too. Effortlessly, really. Two years ago, I went out with a cute Chris Klein lookalike while living in New York. On our second date he took me to a lovely dinner, only to tell me later in the night that I’m probably “too much” for him. I told him that he’s probably a little “too vanilla,” and we casually parted ways. He was okay with my remark and agreed with me… he was the straight-laced quiet type. He was right, though: I was too much for him.

Too bad!

I used to try to tone down my personality and attempted to act more, well, mainstream… but it never worked. If you’re looking for basic, I’m probably not your gal. I’ve never followed the crowd and I usually have a strong opinion about everything. Although I beat to my own drum, I have a big heart; but it won’t go to waste.

Never change, hold back, or dull your sparkle. You’ll attract the right people and opportunities when you keep shining bright! TC mark

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