This Is What I Was Doing While You Moved On

If it’s over, then just say it. Why let it linger? Why continue to come over and tug at my heart? If you think I didn’t see the detachment in your eyes, you are mistaken.

You see, when you told me I was your true love, I believed you. When you looked in my eyes and told me you never felt a love like ours before, I believed you. When you took the time to send me songs that reminded you of me, my walls came down. When you came over to my home with flowers in hand, my heart was ready to receive your love. When you held my hand, wiped my tears, and put my broken pieces back together, I trusted you. When you said I was your angel, your rock, and your best friend, I believed you.

You see, I stood by you when your world fell apart. I kissed all your tears away and gave you open arms when your heart was broken. I gave you time, I gave you passion, I gave you affection, I gave you every part of me when you needed it. I supported your dreams and nourished your soul. I hung on to your every word because I believed in you; I believed in us. I invested in you even though we came from different worlds, because I saw a new life through your eyes. I fell in love with every part of you, especially the imperfections, because my love was real. You see, I gave you space when I believed you needed time. I loved harder when you pulled away and I gave you my heart, the very best part of my broken soul.

You walked away without even a second thought. You walked away with words that pierced my soul. If this was the end, saying “I don’t love you” and “the spark is gone” was a knife that ripped me open. You walked away and never gave me the respect of saying it was over to my face. You walked away, and I stayed. You walked away and moved on like I was a distant memory while the bed was still warm.

While you moved on, I cried. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, and I replayed every moment in my mind. While you moved on, I was there for you in your worst moments of life, and you left me when I needed you the most. While you moved on, I took months to heal. While you moved on, I took two steps forward and 20 steps back. While you moved on, I started to accomplish goals I never knew I was capable of. While you moved on, I did the hard work alone to self-reflect and to finally love the reflection staring back at me. While you moved on, I found happiness and peace independent of anyone else, unlike you.

But I want to thank you for showing me how to slow down and enjoy the moment. I want to thank you for your passion, you opened up a part of me that was untamed, beautiful, and alive. I want to thank you for supporting my dreams and helping me believe in my abilities. I want to thank you for sharing your love, now I appreciate the gift of love. I want to thank you for walking away, because now I see my worth. I see my beauty. I want to thank you for walking away because I deserve more from someone—I deserve better. I am lovable, I am important, I matter, and I am deserving of all the love this life has to offer. And now, I am truly ready for the right person who stays. Thank you.

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