This Is How You Move On From Toxic Love

Twenty20 / @iamlusia

Allow yourself time to grieve. Be gentle with your own heart. Don’t scold it, don’t tell it it should have known better. There’s a blanket of shame surrounding you. You feel claustrophobic. Practice smaller breaths. Remind yourself even the tiniest bit of progress is still progress. You are not expected to move mountains in one day.

Healing will not happen overnight.

Surround yourself with supportive and trustworthy people. Lean on those who love you. People who want nothing from you, just want your happiness. People who want you to get better.

You know, you don’t have to be strong on your own.

Asking for help is not weakness. It takes incredible courage. Everyone recognizes this about you. You are a warrior. A survivor.

Listen to your feelings. They will be painful and confusing, and sometimes you’ll want to numb yourself. You’ll want to put everything on mute. And maybe you’ll try. But those feelings need to be felt. You can’t brush them aside. Everything comes to the surface eventually.

Break down if you need to. Cry and scream, ask yourself how this happened. Ask yourself why. Don’t get a reason. There isn’t always one. But it’s still okay to wonder. You will get through this. You will not stay on the ground forever. You will rise from the ashes. Never underestimate the muscles in your body. You are a Phoenix.

This is ending is not a death sentence. This is rebirth. This is your renewal.

So fall back in love with your passions, with the people in your life. Practice affirmations in the mirror. Self-love is something we need to do over and over until it’s natural. Maybe it feels unnatural right now. Maybe, down deep, you hate yourself. Tell yourself one really nice thing every day. Have a list of all your amazing attributes you can look at when you forget.

Toxic love can leave a scar. Often, it will. And it’s going to hurt to touch for a long time. You won’t forget what happened. You won’t start over with a clean slate.

But you are a survivor. And you will heal. Maybe a little more with every morning. You rely on support from people who care. You invest in yourself. You practice love as an action. Love yourself. Love yourself always. Even when it’s hard.

And slowly, you move on. Slowly, you let go and tell yourself you’re worth it.

Slowly, a new horizon appears. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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