1. Talking about the past. Not dwelling on it, but knowing things that have happened.
2. Traveling together.
3. Traveling together for something that is not a vacation. Anyone can have fun on vacation! The real test is when you need to throw everything in the car and drive for hours to see someone’s ill family member. That’s when things become stressful and real, and the kind of thing you’ll face together in the future as a married couple.
4. Getting sick in front of one another. Food poisoning or a nasty case of the flu. It’s good to know your partner is going to stick around and help take care of you, not bolt when things get gross.
5. Spending the holidays together.
6. Getting into a first big argument. And solving it, not just walking away.
7. You’ve discussed the future and want the same things out of life. Kids, career paths, etc.
8. You’ve spent time living together. Now, this doesn’t mean you ACTUALLY have to live together, but you spend enough time together that you know what living together will be like.
9. You’ve talked finances. I know it’s awkward, but if you’re going to share assets with someone, you hopefully have an idea of how each other spends, credit scores, and other stuff like that.
10. You’ve met each other’s families. And you can easily see yourself fitting in.
11. You’ve done something selfless for each other. No matter how big or small. Knowing someone is capable of putting you first (and you’ll do the same) is what you want in a spouse.