9 Ways Saying “No” Will Definitely Improve Your Life

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Image – marc falardeau
We know the Nike way of doing things – that’s great when we might need a nudge in the right direction. But often we say yes when someone asks us to do something out of fear or when we don’t really mean it, or start to believe it. We can speak up and change our own thought patterns. A negative word can be powerfully empowering and encouraging, too. Instead, get into a frame of mind to say no to change or no to status quo and let things be the good way they are, allow ourselves out of a bad situation into a better one.

9. If there are no stupid questions, then there are also no stupid thoughts, answers or reactions. Teachers create a safe environment in classrooms to promote discussion. But outside the academic world the thought we formulate before we speak is generally “nah, that’s stupid, I shouldn’t say it.” Even when we’re explaining something, we preface it by “it’s probably stupid, but…” We need to eliminate stupid from our vocabulary.

8. There’s no such thing as jinxing yourself. We tend to knock on wood a lot. We’re scared something is not going to pan out, but why not hope for the best instead of preparing for the worst? Say your dream out loud, write your goals down on paper. Years later, you’ll be surprised to look back and see you’ve fulfilled part of your list. If anything it’s the thought that counts.

7. No being mean to yourself. It’s the reverse golden rule we know as treating yourself as you would treat your neighbor. But we are our worst critics. Sometimes we should think of ourselves as strangers and tell little white lies or whisper words of encouragement. Then we can shine that inner admiration outwards.

6. No flaking. Keep your word – don’t bail on your friends or yourself. There’s something to say about sticking to something. Commitment is a skill. As our schedules and our energy levels ebb and flow, it’s so easy to decide not to follow through. Little failures can lead to worse habits and who doesn’t like crossing an appointment (real or metaphorical) off a list?

5. No “really?”. When someone compliments me, I tend to act surprised and respond with really? But more and more, any flattery just flows through me and I’m grateful others see something I don’t. We could add more self-stamps of approval and self-assured confidence so the next time someone recognizes something positive we just silently say in our heads “I know” and “thank you” out loud.

4. No judgment. Take that split second and instead of jumping to conclusions, inject empathy, not analysis or stereotype, into a situation. We never know the full story behind things so there’s no need hold a gavel to anyone’s trials. And why waste your time being jealous or hateful – accept people for who they are – laud them, support them, smile at them (no wrinkles).

3. No growing up. There are very real adult responsibilities to take care of but part of the maturing process is keeping your sense of self, which is formed early on. Keep that inner-child like passion and find free play time. We weren’t as self-conscious as kids, remember? Remember the things that you enjoyed as a child and recreate that feeling to fuel creativity.

2. No more. Stop with cycles of negativity and eliminate the abuse – whether it’s physical, emotional or mental. You can take the reins of your situation. Form a territory; draw a line of self-respect for yourself!

1. No regrets. Enough said. We live one life. Go for what your heart desires without fear. If it doesn’t work out, that’s how it’s meant to be. Experience informs everything. There are no mistakes. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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