1. Open with honesty.
Don’t be a fuckboy (or girl). There is no need to disguise your intentions if they are only to get in and out. There are plenty of people out there who just want sex. Being forthcoming with this will do you more good than harm. As the Dalai Lama would say, “If you conduct your life on the basis of truth and honesty, it gives you a sense of satisfaction and self-confidence.” In layman’s terms, tell the truth and avoid being a dick.
2. Two drink maximum.
Don’t get sloppy when you’re hoping to fuck a stranger. I know, this is a little uptight (and I’m a lady who loves her liquor) but it’s just not a great idea. Drunk sex should be reserved for people you trust a bit more than someone you’ll want to immediately call an Uber for.
3. Use protection.
For the love of God, don’t be an idiot. You don’t want your innocent one night stand turning into an 18 year long commitment.
4. Don’t do any weird sexual kinks without discussing them.
Talk dirty first. Discuss your boundaries. You can make this a very sexy act. Whisper the things you like, the things you’re curious about. Get solid consent before ever attempting anything out of the norm.
5. Pay for the Uber.
If you’re asking her/him to leave, pay for their Uber. It’s common courtesy. Someone just willingly rubbed their naked body against you, be respectful and foot the bill for their way back home.
6. Ask how they are the next morning.
Not because you want to immediately start something and fall madly in love, but because it’s human decency to say, “Hey, how are you?” A solid check in shows that you care and view that person as more than just a vehicle for sex.