41 Micro Red Flags To Look Out For That Show Someone Might Be A Narcissist

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Jake Davies

1. They continue to call you multiple times when you don’t pick up.

2. They tell you what to wear, what to say, how to act and what you should be doing with your life.

3. They need some blank statement of validation like ‘Tell me you love me.’

4. You say you love them and they reply, ‘I know.’

5. They force blame on you for things that aren’t actually your fault.

6. Most of the conversation comes back to talking about them.

7. They have an inflated sense of self-worth thinking they are some hero or someone so much greater than an average person.

8. They constantly break the rules thinking it isn’t something that applies to them.

9. There’s a constant need to want to know and control everything.

10. They cross lines because they feel like it without any regard to someone’s feelings.

11. They don’t possess empathy or caring for anyone but themselves.

12. They view themselves very highly and feel the need to want to prove themselves to others.

13. The way they speak about themselves is boastful and arrogant.

14. Some statement like ‘I really do believe I am one of the best people there is.’

15. They feel a sense of entitlement.

16. They feel you are almost an extension of them and you shouldn’t make them look bad.

17. They set unrealistic expectations and judge you harshly if you don’t meet them.

18. Blame is never on them but someone else saying things like ‘If I did it, it would have been right.’

19. The truly believe they are the only one who can do something right.

20. They need to feel needed and feel they are in control.

21. They manipulate you into thinking you really can’t function without them.

22. They give things just to take them away or threaten you.

23. They hold kind gestures over your head to use later. ‘

24. They make you feel like it’s your fault when they react a certain way and can’t control their emotions.

25. They say things like ‘if you just did this right or acted this way, I wouldn’t be so angry with you.’

26. When they lose their shit they always come back with an apology saying, ‘you know it’s because I love you right?’

27. When you bring up something bad from the past that has happened, they deny it and say you are exaggerating.

28. They remember the past in a light that only makes them look good.

29. They care a lot of what people think of them so the front they put up is different than how they are behind closed doors.

30. They strive for perfection passing those expectations onto you. As the victim, you never feel good enough for them.

31. They have this idea of the role they want you to play and if you steer away from it they lose it.

32. They are good liars and if you attempt to even reveal the truth, they will crucify you for messing up their image and reputation.

33. They do not want to change nor do they feel the need to.

34. They attempt to ruin things that aren’t about them. Holidays or celebrations where the focus is on someone else, they will pout and give an attitude.

35. They control with fear. They want you to be afraid of them.

36. With fear comes manipulation.

37. They don’t like people who challenge them because they are used to people folding at their tactics.

38. They have a high level of anxiety because they want to control everything.

39. And when they feel things are outside of their control they react aggressively jumping to conclusions and including everyone in a problem they’ve created.

40. They repress how they feel and struggle with truly expressing emotions. So they come across as mean and cold when in reality they are really guarded and only comfortable expressing things like anger and blame.

41. They need you more than you need them and they are afraid of that moment you realize it and potentially walk away. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

But Before You Leave

“Losing you would be like losing part of me, only it’d be losing the best part of me.”

“Even if your voice is shaking, never stop asking for what you want.”

Kirsten’s writings really touch me. It’s like all the things I have ever thought of or wanted to say are expressed through her writing. I resonate with so much of it. It’s so deeply touching, moving, raw and just plain real. There were times reading I teared up because something said just went straight to my heart. I think I honestly highlighted almost the whole book! —Elizabeth

Buy The Book
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