Why Girls Who Marry Nice Guys End Up The Happiest

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Maybe the saying nice guys finish last applies to dating when you’re young. It always seemed that girls always went for a certain type of guy. The same guy that hurts her and disappoints her but she always went back to him. She turned to her guy friend who was always there without hesitation. The same guy who respected her. The same guy who loved her.

I think a lot of nice guys have a similar story of their greatest flaw being that they were too nice and some girls didn’t fall for it.

But in time, as girls grew up they got tired of being unhappy with the people they choose. They grow up and they learn. Instead of going for the same type of guy that hurts them every time, they take a chance on a nice guy.

And he’s different in every way she’s every deserved and wanted.

1. He doesn’t pretend to be someone he isn’t.

He is who he is. He’s not going to play the role of what someone wants him to be. He’s going to be himself because even when he’s been frustrated in the past with relationships, he knows what he brings to the table and he knows the women willing to sit with him is just as lucky as he is.

2. He treats her well all the time.

He’s kind. And it isn’t some act or something that fades. How he treats her is consistent because good buys don’t gain anything from putting someone else down. They lift others up.

3. The relationship is honest and simple.

If there’s one thing good guys have learned it’s not to lead others on or play with their feelings, the way people have done for them. They learn to do relationships right for every one they’ve had wrong. They learn to love correctly and not with half their heart just because they’ve been hurt.

4. He loves her unconditionally.

Even in her worst and most intolerable forms he accepts, he loves her and he never stops choosing her. It’s the type of love that takes work but they both are willing to put in their the effort.

Any couple knows it’s not 50/50. Some days the wife can only give 20% and the husband has gotta make up for the 80%. That can switch at any moment but what remains is love and effort.

5. His happiness includes doing anything to make her happy.

When she is happy, that’s truly when he is and while he has goals and ambitions a lot of them are motivated by giving her the best life he can.

6. He adores her.

He still looks at her the same way he always has like she’s the best women he’s ever known.

7. He appreciates her.

While she might be overlooked by some people, he’s not one of them. He knows what she does for him, for the family, for everyone. And that appreciation and gratitude it’s why she keeps doing it.

8. He surprises her.

He keeps things exciting not letting the flame die out. Whether it’s bringing home something she likes or getting her a gift for no reason. He enjoys putting a smile on her face.

9. He takes care of her. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.

Physically they still have it. Sex is still important and it hasn’t gotten dull.

Mentally he’s worked just as much as she has to build that connection and keep it exhilarating. A connection that challenges each other even if they have different beliefs. A connection that pushes each other to grow and learn.

Emotionally they are each other’s rock. Everything in their marriage is a team and they face it together and overcome it. Marriage isn’t easy but it’s a little bit easier when you’re standing next to someone who you know with certainty won’t leave.

10. He makes effort with her friends and family.

He cares about her family because they are his too. He makes an effort with her friends and keeps his eye out for the friends she might not see are toxic. He wants to protect her from anyone who might take advantage her or use her or hurt her. But it will never be him who does those things.

11. He cares more about resolving fights than starting them.

No one is nice all the time. Everyone has their boiling point. And every couple is going to fight. But the thing about nice guys is they want to find solutions fast. They will listen to what she has to say, they will choose their battles wisely but they don’t give up or walk out on her.

12. He works hard.

The most admirable traits of good guys are they aren’t lazy especially when he has a family and a wife to provide for (regardless of the family situation of who is working and who isn’t). He works hard because he has to and wants to. He wants to make her life and the life of his kids better than his might have been.

13. He makes her better.

He knows to make a woman her best self, you need to love her and appreciate her and value her. His love and understanding makes her better. How he tries so hard. How he loves so deeply. He thinks he’s the lucky one and it’s that mindset that leads the wife to count her own blessings every single day.

14. He’s a great father.

She loves him for how great of a husband he is but she falls deeper in love with him every time she sees him interact with the kids. She wonders if the kids know how lucky they are to have him because nice guys truly are the best fathers.

14. He believes in her. He supports her. He stands by her.

When she’s doubtful, he’s confident. When she’s scared, he’s brave. When she’s hurt, he’s the arms that hold her and the strength to keep her going. When she needs something to believe in she looks towards him and he looks at her and knows she can do anything. But in reality, it’s the love they have for one another that pushes them to be that relationship that will last until they are old.

Nice guys are the best guys, girls don’t realize that but women do. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

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