20 Things Alpha Females Do Differently To Get The Commitment We All Seek

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1. She doesn’t wait by her phone.

Whether he calls her or not it doesn’t affect her life. She’d like to hear from him but she doesn’t need to hear from him to be happy.

2. She isn’t easy to read or always available.

She keeps him on his toes because she knows in the beginning even if she hates games she doesn’t want to lose.

3. She established right off the bat what she will tolerate and what she won’t.

She won’t tolerate disrespect or unkindness. And if you treat her that way she won’t try and prove she deserves something different, she’ll just stop associating with you because she knows how someone treats another person reflects how they feel about themselves.

4. She doesn’t accept excuses.

She’s not going to give you a second chance to hurt her or let her down.

5. She doesn’t overthink situations.

She’s confident. And confidence has not room for doubt.

6. She doesn’t care what anyone thinks of her.

She’s built herself up in such a way that other people’s opinions don’t matter if she’s okay with the person she is and the choices she makes.

7. She’s built a life she’s proud of.

She genuinely loves every part of her life and is happy with it.

8. She doesn’t try too hard.

She impresses people without trying much at all. Because she isn’t worried about them she’s focused on herself.

9. She isn’t easy.

She knows she has more to offer a man than sex.

10. She’s authentic.

She doesn’t try to be like everyone else or like the same things they do. She beats to her own drum and that attracts people to her. She’s not someone you so easily forget.

11. She doesn’t gossip.

She knows it’s more important to talk about things than people because talking about others shows you’re insecure about yourself and she isn’t insecure.

12. She takes care of herself.

Mentally. She pulls back and does her own thing when she needs to.

Physically. She wants to look good to reflect how she feels.

Emotionally. She wants the right relationship, not just any relationship.

What is attractive is she doesn’t need a guy. She doesn’t need someone to take care of her financially. She doesn’t need a guy to make her feel better about herself. She doesn’t need to guy because she isn’t lonely. A relationship will add to the life she’s already built.

13. She isn’t competitive.

She walks into the room not with her nose in the air thinking she’s better. She walks into a room not comparing herself to anyone in the first place. And any guy who tries to pin her against someone else, she walks away because that’s not even a battle worth her time and attention and with that attitude, she’s won.

14. She dates. She doesn’t hang out.

She knows dating isn’t old fashion and chivalry isn’t dead. She demands those things. She doesn’t answer booty calls or meet up just because someone suggested it. She probably won’t even answer if you try and text her too late.

15. She isn’t looking for a relationship.

She knows the more you look the more you are looking to settle. And she’ll never settle.

16. She does relationships, not casual ones.

You’ll never find this girl in almost relationships or waiting around for someone to commit. She chooses people who want her and only her.

17. She controls her emotions.

Regardless of how he may act and even when she wants to lose her shit, she’s never going to come across as that crazy person. She handles herself with grace and self-respect and if there is an issue she addresses it and talks it out and finds a solution.

18. She leaves him wanting more.

She knows exactly how much to give and when to walk away leaving him wanting more. And when she does it’s him who is at her whim and her who is in control.

19. She never once questions how he feels about her.

The question never is does he like her but why wouldn’t he like her? And that confidence, that little bit of cockiness is what carries her and that’s exactly how she gets a relationship.

20. She’s happy.

The greatest difference between the girls who are in relationships and the girls who envy those who are is one them realizes her own happiness is within her control and it has nothing to do with a relationship status.

While the other girl tries a little too hard, analyzes things a little too closely, gets her hopes up a little too quickly and when it doesn’t work out she thinks it’s something she’s done wrong.

But alphas don’t make mistakes when it comes to how they date because how they date is how they live their life. Confidently and unapologetically. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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