This Is The Kind Of Guy You Shouldn’t Wait For

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The guy who keeps you waiting by your phone, even though you know he read it.

The guy who continues to reschedule or cancel because he doesn’t care enough to make you a priority.

The guy who messes with your head and sends you mixed signals about how he feels.

The guy who doesn’t tell you there’s someone else when clearly there is and he’s trying to hide it.

The guy who ignores your text then blows up your newsfeed.

The guy who says he likes you and cares about you but not enough to show it.

The guy who uses the excuse that ‘it’s not a good time right now.’

The guy who is an expert at sorry.

The guy who won’t take you on a real date. And would rather just ‘hang out.’

The guy who uses the excuse ‘he’s not ready for a relationship right now.’ What he’s really saying is he’s not ready for a relationship with you.

The guy who blames his ex for the fact he has trust issues like it’s your job to make him feel secure. The only reason he questions what you do is probably because he’s doing the same thing too.

The guy who doesn’t want you to meet his parents and every time you bring it up he someone changes the subject.

The guy who only ever wants to see you after a night out but never lets you stay long in the morning.

The guy who swears one day you guys will get it right but not now.

The guy who has mastered the art of keeping lines blurry.

The guy who wants the physical parts of a relationship but won’t emotionally commit.

The guy who is unsure about everything else in his life. Where he’s going? What he’s doing? If he’s not sure of things in his own life he’s never going to be sure of you.

The guy who makes you feel like it’s a competition between you and someone else.

The guy who makes you wonder how he feels and doesn’t add confidence that you’re one he cares about.

The guy who leaves you in the dark about big decisions that might impact both of you.

The guy who has a bad rep. The one your friends don’t like.

The guy who has already hurt you many times before.

These are the types of guys you gotta stop waiting for.

The ones you might want but even if you got them you know you’d be settling.

The ones who make it about the chase but that’s all it is some games.

The guys who break you down to build themselves up. Taking pieces of you to fill the void others have left them with.

These aren’t men. These are unsure boys. Because a real man knows one woman is enough. And it’s his job to make her feel secure in him.e.

But it isn’t up to you to prove your worth.

It isn’t up to you to earn their respect.

It isn’t up to you to convince them to care.

So when you come across boys who are unsure and keep you guessing don’t waste anymore time on them.

Walk away with your head high because you deserve something more than uncertainty and mixed signals.

You deserve a little more than everything you’ve tolerated in the past.

And the minute you stop tolerating and buying into every excuse and giving them chances they are going to go away. Because they don’t have it in them to try even a little and you deserve a whole lot. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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