1. You don’t want to.
You’re still hanging onto hope, that something might change. As much as it hurts to still care and hold on, you think it hurts less than really letting him go.
2. You’re trying to be friends.
You think you’d rather have him in your life as a friend than nothing at all but the truth is it’s hurting you to play that role.
3. You aren’t even trying to date anyone else.
You have him on some pedestal that no one can reach. So even when you go out you’re emotionally unavailable and not giving anyone a shot.
4. You still look for any reason to text him.
You’re still looking for any reason to talk to him. And you do. Every little thing you’ll blow up his phone about just to see if he answers.
5. You still like his shit.
You haven’t blocked him or unfriended him because you want to know what’s going on in your life and you miss when you were apart of it. And you also post things with that little bit of hope he’s going to like it.
6. You aren’t letting go of the past.
You keep letting the past interfere with the present. He might have been a good guy then but the right guy won’t hurt you or break up with you. People change as do relationships and you can’t hold onto what used to be.
7. You’re still hooking up with him.
Whenever you two drink you end up together. And it’s just opening up a wound you aren’t letting heal. Friends with benefits doesn’t work after someone has already been hurt.
8. You still talk about him to your friends.
Your friends are polite and will listen because they love you but in reality, they want to slap you across the face if you say his name one more time or analyze some detail that doesn’t mean something you want it to.
9. You still see him often.
You go out of your way to still see him. And every time you see him your heart breaks all over again. Seeing him makes you feel good for a moment then it hits you hard and kills. The right person would be there and make you feel whole instead of making you feel empty standing across from you in the same room.
10. You still love him.
I know you still love him. I know you think no one else can compare to him. But the truth is you love the person he used to be or the person you’ve built him up to be, to a point that even he can’t compare to this person you think he is in your mind. Love blinds us. But you aren’t ready to fall out of love yet.
11. You’re choosing to break your own heart instead of healing it.
Every time you text him or see him or like his shit you are taking another step back from healing. The truth is none of us want to let go of the person we love out of fear of realizing it was only us holding on the entire time. It’s a hard realization to come to. But one day you’ll realize this pain isn’t something he’s causing, you are causing it yourself choosing someone who isn’t choosing you.