This Is Why I’ll Only Have One Marriage And It’ll Be One That Lasts

 Dallas Totra
Dallas Totra

Because I believe in loving someone for better or worse.

You don’t just love someone on their good days and in their best moods. You love someone for all the parts of them. You love someone at their worst because even their worst makes you better.

I believe in working through the bad days because it’s only when you do that, you’ll appreciate the good days.

Because I believe in loving someone through sickness and in health.

Regardless of how difficult a road it might be to have to be the strong one when your loved one is weak, you have to play that role. And there will be times when you are lonely. There will be times when you need someone to hold you but as hard as it is for you, it’s harder for them. It will be in these difficult moments you realize how strong you are and that’s what will give your partner strength.

Because I believe in loving someone for richer or poorer.

I know when I decide to get married and who I decide to marry what will matter isn’t how much money they make or what they do. But rather who we motivate each other to be. It is there will we find success. I know it’ll be someone who holds the same values as myself.

To me, wealth isn’t defined by someone’s bank account but rather the quality of the person standing beside me.

I know the right relationship and the right person will be someone who, like myself works hard. I know it’ll be someone who makes me better. The person I marry doesn’t need to have it all together. I’m okay with figuring that part out together. Success and wealth will certainly make things easier but a foundation of love and support needs to be there before anything else.

There will always be risks but if you have confidence in your partner then you take the career chances regardless of the cost because you have faith in them. Everything is about faith. That thing you can’t see but feel so deeply. That thing that makes you look at them and say ‘go for it even if you’re scared.’ It’s about believing in someone more than yourself and trusting them blindly.

Because I believe in loving someone in good times and in bad.

I don’t believe in quitting. I don’t believe in divorce. I believe in working through things. I believe in talking things out and compromising. I don’t believe in going to bed angry. I believe in solving the problem that at hand.

Marriage won’t be easy on some days. But what I hope to never forget is why we fell in love in the first place. I think people forget that sometimes. I think people stop valuing the person next to them.

To avoid that, the best thing you can do is hold onto every good day and let that be the light on the days that are darker.

Because I believe in loving someone for all the days of my life.

I think the love you have for someone changes as each of you grow and learn from each other. But it’s a matter of growing together. But I believe love doesn’t just go away. Love requires effort and you have to be willing to try time and time again.

I believe in a love that lasts forever. I don’t believe in throwing in the towel when things get hard.

But of all things I believe in most more than vows and promises is the person that will be standing beside me.

I believe in love stories that last 50+ years. And I know that’s going to be my story one day because I believe love is everything it’s cracked up to be.

Until death do us part.

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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