Thought Catalog

How To Deal With A Mess Like A 20-Something: Kitchen Messes Edition

  • 0

Kitchen Messes (With Roommates)

Walk into the kitchen. There are cabinet doors open. There’s a brown paper bag on the island from god knows how many days ago, and god knows whether it contained wine or bread (although it was probably one of those two things). Someone has finished his hummus but left the container open and “near” the recycling.

And the dishes. Dear god, the dishes.

Stifle your urge to slam the cabinets closed while passive-aggressively muttering about the state of this public space. Instead, open your fridge and get your cranberry juice. Neatly pour it into the same glass you always use, mainly because you know if you don’t keep it hidden in your room at all times, it’ll be dirty and discarded into The Heap Near The Sink in five minutes flat. Remain silent. Keep a cheerful smile on your face. All the while, be thinking of the worst curses you could possibly cast on your blissfully oblivious roommate.

Leave the cabinet doors open, the bag on the island, the hummus container “near” the recycling, and the dishes festering on the counter. When you come back out in twenty minutes and all of it’s still there, repeat.

Kitchen Messes (Without Roommates)

Walk into the kitchen. There are cabinet doors open. There’s a brown paper bag on the island from god knows how many days ago, and god knows whether it contained wine or bread (although it was probably one of those two things). An empty hummus container sits “near” the recycling.

Your one set of dishes is dirty. Consider washing them. Opt for a solo cup from the depths of some cabinet.

Open your fridge to get your cranberry juice. You have about a third of a glass left. You stare into the crimson ocean as you debate whether or not you should go grocery shopping. Survey the fridge. Chinese take-out from two weeks ago: not edible. Mustard: edible. Cheese: edible? It looks okay. You scan the island and spot a heel of bread left over that’s sort of wrapped up in plastic. You’ll risk it.

Take your open-faced cheese and mustard sandwich back to your room as you reassure yourself that messes, when you’re living by your lonesome, really just mean you’re doing better things with your time than keeping your kitchen clean. TC mark

image – abbamouse
Powered by Revcontent

Poetry Lovers! 💖

Love a soft person. The ones who are positive, even in the worst of circumstances. Someone whose strength is not in bravado, but in their quiet. Someone who is strong for others because that is what is needed in that moment. Someone who is the moon that soothes instead of the sun that burns. Someone who sees the very best in people even when you think they aren’t worth it. The kind of person who always wants to do the best for those they love.

“I bought this on a whim to read as I was resting for the night, and I do not regret it one bit! Everything about the poetry in this book is amazing, heart breaking, and soul searching. It will lift your spirits on your darkest days. I want to thank the author so much for writing this, as it’s something I will be rereading a lot! Always remember, everything about you is important. You matter.” —McKayla

Click to heal your heart

More From Thought Catalog

How To Deal With A Mess Like A 20-Something: Kitchen Messes Edition is cataloged in , , , , , ,
  • Anneka

    Preach

    • Jack Attack

      like OH EM GEE. this is totes what mah’ apaht’ment is like. yo totes nailed it brah’. ‘cept yous left out the bearded man who festers in his own waste.

  • PUBLICPERV

    i adore this.

  • http://twitter.com/ingenuegle Egle Makaraite

    Is it just me or are both of the messes in the scenarios caused by you?

  • http://bangbangcanary.com/ Cat

    sounds about right

  • http://www.facebook.com/m.paigekelly Megan Kelly

    It’s almost like you live in my house.
    Wait… do you live in my house?

  • coffeeandinternets

    One of these days, I promise you my kitchen WILL actually clean itself.
    Any day now.

  • http://kilakilakila.blogspot.com/ brittany wallace

    my roommate is the perfect housewife. i love him.

  • Karen Shea

    don’t forget the fruit flies

  • goldglass

    As long as the kitchen messes are kept to the kitchen…at a particularly confusing time of his life, my old roommate had a habit of leaving empty cup noodles in the shower.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

    My kitchen smells like bananas and fruit flies are EVERYWHERE.

  • Nate

    This sounds familiar.

  • Anonymous

    This is how every kitchen has been that I have lived in regardless of different roommates. No one was passive agressive about the mess though, we all admitted to being messy and would try to deep clean together every few sundays.

  • Guest

    Hah this was really awesome! I enjoyed this article and I hope you stick around TC because Kat George is writing WAY to much fucking shit! I’m a goddamn chef and I always bitch about dirty kitchens…. What they don’t know is that I live alone, and still have that vichyssoise from family meal 2 weeks ago behind my milk and eggs.

blog comments powered by Disqus