You know everyone around you keep telling you to be hopeful, be positive, to keep faith. You having the mind of a typical girl in love will do as they say. Well let me give you a reality slap and tell you that hope kills you.
It is the feeling of ‘what if’ if that phrase is a person. What if he likes me? What if he’ll text me today? What if that comment about my hair was more than a compliment? What if he meant he liked me when he told me I’m pretty? These questions make you feel all giddy. Hope makes ‘yes’ the answer to all these questions.
Can you see why hope kills you? Because the moment you realise that the answer is ‘no’, well, you’ll die. Just a little part of you maybe but still, you die. All those imaginary scenarios you pictured about you and him just cuddling on the couch all turn into a dream that seems to be thrown far far away into the unreachable galaxy.
That is why, I am here to tell you that hope is useless. Don’t get me wrong though. Hope is what keeps us going sometimes. It is at times the only motivation for us to keep striving to get what we want. However, when the situation doesn’t happen in our favour, well again I tell you, hope is what kills you.
Why do we do this to ourselves? It’s like we never learn from our previous mistakes. It’s like we’re doing this on purpose. Do we? Do we do this on purpose? If we do, why? Why do we keep doing things that we know will end up ruining us if things do not turn out the way we want them to?
Maybe those are just rhetorical questions not meant to be answered. Maybe the answer to those questions is hope. Hope that one day things might just turn out just as we planned. Hope that this time around, he does really like me and I’m not just a hopeless romantic falling for a guy out of my league. Maybe, just maybe, this time, hope would not be killing me.