This Is The Change You Need To Make To Finally Find Love, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

Pablo Heimplatz

Aries

(March 21st to April 19th)

You will find love once you stop allowing yourself to be intimidated by commitment and closeness. You’re used to running around on your own – experiencing new adventures and doing whatever you want without having to worry about someone else. So even when you find someone great, you never let yourself open up because you’re afraid you’ll lose your sense of self and your adventurous spirit. But as soon as you learn that relationships and independence are not mutually exclusive, you’ll have a much easier time finding love.

Taurus

(April 20th to May 21st)

You will find love once you stop trying to control your own love life. The fact that you’re so warm and that you love so deeply are some of the best things about you, but you also struggle to let things go and to just let things happen. It’s good to have high standards and to expect your future partner to treat you with respect and care, but you also have to remember that everyone is human and that you have to be willing to work with your partner instead of expecting them to be a flawless significant other all day every day.

Gemini

(May 22nd to June 21st)

You will find love once you give yourself permission to fully be you in front of the person you’re dating. You’ve always been able to attract people and meet people thanks to your dynamic and outgoing personality, but you’ve never let them know you below the surface. As soon as you start to open up and show people the more sensitive and vulnerable side of yourself, the sooner you’ll find love.

Cancer

(June 22nd to July 22nd)

You will find love once you start actively giving your heart to the right people. Because you’re so compassionate, loving, and open, you attract a lot of wonderful people – but you also attract people who want to take advantage of your empathy and selflessness. But once you start looking for as much love as you give, your life will begin to filter out the kinds of people who are just there to take, take, take. You will spend less time putting your heart back together after it was unfairly broken and you will spend more time sharing your warmth with those who deserve it.

Leo

(July 23rd to August 22nd)

You will find love once you realize that you can’t plan it out the way you plan out everything else in your life. You’re a go-getter and an enthusiastic individual, and you’re used to going after what you want. But the problem with love is that you can’t control it or manipulate it the way you’ve been able to manipulate other things in your life. As soon as you stop trying to manage every aspect of your love life and instead just start learning to enjoy the unpredictability of it, you’ll have a much easier time finding the right person.

Virgo

(August 23rd to September 22nd)

You will find love when you stop letting your brain come up with reasons why it will never work out. You’re a textbook overthinker and you always have a million thoughts zooming around in your head at once. Often, that means that your brain tries to drown you with ‘what if’ scenarios and questions and worries about how this newest person is going to break your heart. When you give your mind permission to just enjoy itself when you’ve met someone new – instead of coming up with all the reasons why it won’t work out – you’ll have a much easier time quieting your worries and just letting yourself be in the moment instead.

Libra

(September 23rd to October 22nd)

You will find love once you stop being obsessed with the chase. You’re so charming and so easy to get along with, but it becomes an issue when things start to slow down with one person and you can’t seem to get comfortable with comfort. You love the thrill of dating someone new, but as soon as things start to get a little familiar and safe, you suddenly become indecisive and freaked out about settling down.

Scorpio

(October 23rd to November 22nd)

You will find love once you give yourself permission to lean on others and let them into your world. You’re so self-sufficient and independent that you have a hard time believing that you can trust anyone else as much as you trust yourself. As soon as you allow yourself to believe that you deserve to be happy with someone and that love only makes you stronger (rather than weaker), you’ll have a much easier time making room for love in your life.

Sagittarius

(November 23rd to December 21st)

You will find love once you start being assertive in your own dating life. You’re a very optimistic, cheery, and positive person, but sometimes you confuse that with being active, too – and they are not the same things. Because you often ‘hope for the best,’ you think that’s enough – but you also have to intentionally put yourself out there and be willing to risk getting hurt. Once you take ‘being open to love’ to the next level by actually throwing yourself into the dating deep end, you’ll have a lot more luck in your love life.

Capricorn

(December 22nd to January 20th)

You will find love once you stop thinking that being ‘logical’ in your love life and being ‘cynical’ in your love life are one and the same. It’s great to be practical, to know what you want, and to understand that love is supposed to be hard. But sometimes you use that as an excuse to be negative and downbeat about dating. Once you realize that you can be optimistic and open to love without losing your sense of realism, you’ll be in a much better state.

Aquarius

(January 21st to February 18th)

You will find love once you stop putting all of your energy into protecting yourself. It’s good to be shrewd and to look out for yourself in the dating world, but when it gets to the point where you’re closing yourself off to every person you date once they’ve gotten to a certain level of closeness with you – you’re never going to get very far. Until you stop the urge to remain detached and disconnected in your relationships, you’re not going to find the love you’re looking for.

Pisces

(February 19th to March 20th)

You will find love once you stop letting other people tell you what you want. You’re so accommodating and open to the ideas and advice of others, but at some point, you need to just decide what you want for yourself and stop letting everyone else tell you who to date or how to date. Once you start listening to yourself instead of twenty other people, you’ll have a much easier (and much more enjoyable) time in your own love life. TC mark

Kim Quindlen

I'm a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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