14 Ways To Love An Old Soul

Matt Popovich

1. Always do the little things with them. Grand gestures are nice for everyone, but they’ll treasure the walks you share, and the inside jokes you find, and the meals where you actually sit at the kitchen table and look at each other, more than you’ll ever know.

2. Be honest about what you want. Old souls are the definition of overthinkers – they don’t enjoy the ‘thrill’ of wondering what’s going to happen next. If you are upfront and unabashed about your feelings, they’re not going to be turned off or freaked out. They’re just going to feel a thousand times more relaxed and open with you.

3. Be truthful. Love them enough to tell them the things they need to hear, even when it hurts.

4. Make them feel like their presence is enough – that you don’t need another buffer there with the two of you, such as a fancy restaurant or an exclusive party or an Instagram-worthy background.

5. Instead, make them feel like they are enough for you just as they are – with their thoughts, their laughter, their words, and their connection with you.

6. Don’t be scared by their fear of love. Their fear has nothing to do with not wanting to love you, and everything to do with being terrified of losing what they’ve found with you. Help them to take it day by day, and help them to understand that you’re not going anywhere.

7. Love things, even if it’s only because they love them. They don’t need you to enjoy every one of their hobbies or favorite pastimes – but the simple act of showing interest or making the effort to attend something with them, just because you know it matters to them, is an easy way to make them feel supported and cared about and like they’ve found a home with you.

8. And share your ‘things’ with them too. Even if it would otherwise bore them or annoy them, they will care about it because you care about it.

9. Don’t try to change who they are, just try to understand them a little bit more each day. They’ll do the same for you.

10. Don’t play games with them. They’re not checking to see if you’ve waited at least ten minutes to text them back or if you make sure to be available but not too available. They just want to feel like they can be a person with you, without having to think about love or dating as a very specific process with a rigid order of proper steps.

11. Never stop asking questions – the curious ones, not the accusatory ones. Never stop wanting to know more about them, because they’ll never stop wanting to know about you.

12. Challenge them when they try to slide back into their comfort zone. You can still love them for who they are, while still reminding them that you know they’re capable of more.

13. Learn with them, because there’s no single, right thing to learn and there’s no, single right way to learn. Just make sure to foster the kind of relationship where the two of you are always growing and always changing – always together.

14. Talk to them just as much about the little things as you do about the big things. The little things, the everyday experiences in the life you share together, are what will make them feel truly close to you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Kim Quindlen

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

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