1. Whenever you’re out with a group of friends, you’re always the first person everybody comes to when they need anything: Advil, a tampon, Tums, chapstick, tissues, gum, life advice, etc.
2. And whatever it is that they need, you usually always have it. Your purse puts the Mary Poppins bag to shame.
3. You can’t count the number of times you’ve held someone’s hair back at a party.
4. …Half the time, it was someone you didn’t even know.
5. And on the rare occasion that you’re the drunkest one at the party, all hell breaks loose and nobody even knows what to do with themselves. Your friends are torn between insane excitement over getting to watch you lose your shit, and overwhelming fear about who will take on the Mom role while you’re doing tequila shots.
6. You always have ~*snacks*~ on your person. And everybody teases you for it… until they are hungry and begging you for a Nutrigrain bar.
7. Your friends are always flabbergasted at some of the things you know how to do, things you consider pretty simple. Like stitching up a tear in a shirt, or cutting up an avocado. They assume that knowing these types of things means you know how to do literally everything. So even when you tell them you don’t know how to resole a shoe, they’re convinced you’ll be able to figure it out.
8. You’ve been able to fix any stuck zipper that has ever come across your path.
9. You’re always yelling at your friends in the car if they’re texting while driving or not wearing their seat belts. And you feel zero percent bad about it. Someone’s gotta look out for these idiots.
10. On more than one occasion, you’ve received a birthday card from one of your friends that says “Mom” on the front. And you loved it.
11. You’ve also received “Happy Mother’s Day” texts from your friends before. And even though the texts were mostly funny, you know they were also a little bit serious.
12. Your friends tell you on a consistent basis that if it wasn’t for you, they’d probably be in jail.
13. When you guys are spending time outdoors it takes everything in your power not to scream at everybody until they put on sunscreen.
14. When significant others come into the picture, you can always tell that you’re the friend they’re most nervous about meeting.
15. And while meeting them you have to work really hard to make sure it’s just a conversation and not an interrogation.
16. Regardless of how much or how little medical knowledge you actually have, you’re always the one that everybody poses their questions to: Can I take Tylenol if I’m going to drink tonight? Is this bug bite anything to worry about? What do I do if I missed a birth control pill?
17. “Be safe” is your go-to motto, and according to your friends, you should pretty much trademark the phrase.
18. You complain about being The Mom sometimes, but for the most part, you love it. Taking care of people and keeping everyone happy is in your nature, so if that means you’re the designated MomFriend, then so be it.