35 Questions More Important Than “What Color Is The Dress?”

Tumblr / Swiked
Tumblr / Swiked

1. Did Angelina feel like her leg overshadowed her at the 2012 Oscars?

2. What does anything that Miley Cyrus posts on Instagram mean?

3. How many days in a row can I order something from Seamless before I need to be slapped in the face?

4. Are we on Season 82 or Season 83 of The Voice?

5. Did Anna Wintour play the White Witch from The Chronicles of Narnia or was that a different woman?

6. Who was responsible for painting Gotye in the “Somebody That I Used To Know” music video?

7. If you do something or go somewhere but you didn’t take pictures, did it happen?

8. Is Blue Ivy more successful than The Queen?

9. Am I hallucinating or do I keep seeing Louis Stevens’s dad in commercials now?

10. Should you look the cashier in the eye when you’re buying Imodium? Or come to a mutual understanding where you pretend it isn’t happening?

11. Was Lindsay Lohan actually the drunk, dancing shark in Katy Perry’s halftime show?

12. Has anyone checked on Ruben Studdard lately? Is he okay?

13. Wait… is American Idol still a thing? Who have the past seven winners been?

14. Are internet trolls actually real people?

15. How did I never figure out that Dumbledore was gay?

16. Has anyone ever walked across Abbey Road without taking a Beatles picture?

17. How does the husband of E.L. James feel about… everything?

18. Did anyone in the world ever watch Sarah Palin’s reality show?

19. Have any of the singers from Kidz Bop had a meltdown yet?

20. Am I the only one who remembers when Vince Vaughn was in The Lost World: Jurassic Park?

21. Does everyone else have a “fake nice voice” too or is that just me?

22.  What does Lana Del Rey sound like in real life?

23. Are any of the women on Dance Moms not projecting?

24. Remember when Kristen Stewart was in Panic Room? Lol.

25. What did people smell like before deodorant was a thing?

26. How many humble brags can I throw out there in one sitting before people start catching on?

27. Why does my dishwasher always sound like it’s making the “Droid” noise?

28. Do you have to make a certain amount of money before you’re allowed to use an earpiece while you’re on the phone?

29. Is it possible to watch only one episode of a show at a time on Netflix instead of at least three to four?

30. How would a stranger respond if you walked up to them, said “Ovaries,” and then walked away?

31. Are people allowed to propose to someone without using a flash mob?

32. Is it possible to forget about Justin Timberlake’s role in Model Behavior or will that always haunt me?

33. What was it like to be on the set of Brink! starring Erik von Detten?

34. Is someone responsible for periodically checking in on Snooki’s child?

35. Nevermind, I can’t handle it: what color is the damn DRESS? I’m confused and scared. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

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