1. I’m going to try really hard not to be judgey and I know I won’t be successful.
2. Is that actually supposed to be a dress? I feel like she meant it to be a dress. But it just looks like a confused t-shirt.
3. I don’t even like that photo. I just liked it because Instagram etiquette dictates that they must like mine back.
4. I feel hungover just from looking at that photo of them shotgunning.
5. Someone tell her to stop using Marilyn Monroe quotes in her captions.
6. Okay, #FOMO actually feels like a serious disease right now.
7. That party they’re at looks like a scene out of Wolf of Wall Street.
8. I’m not sure if this girl knows anyone besides her boyfriend.
9. How is this person functional enough to make brunch instead of going to it?
10. Maybe if I stare at that picture of her coffee long enough, it will appear in my hand.
11. Uploading photos of Fireball shots should be illegal.
12. I cannot handle the amount of hashtags that girl always uses in their photos.
13. Someone needs to explain to her that you’re supposed to space out the photos that you upload. Because right now it feels like she’s just vomiting up pictures all over my Insta feed.
14. I can’t tell if she’s at a costume party or not.
15. Captioning a photo with the word “Turnt” should not be allowed.
16. Unfortunately, scrolling through my Instagram feed for a long time somehow makes me feel like I’m being productive.
17. That photo was everything but candid.
18. Maybe if I stalk some celebrity accounts, I’ll be inspired to get my life together.
19. How does this person have a job?
20. Wait… do they have a job?
21. I haven’t left my bed yet today, but I feel like I’ve seen so much.
22. …too much.
23. I hope most of these people feel as bad as I do today.