1. Pregnancy tests are expensive.
2. Labor doesn’t have to be terrifying. Not educating yourself prior to is.
3. Breastfeeding is not for every mom and that’s ok.
4. Nap time will be your new personal heaven, which you undoubtedly will waste catching up on your shows or playing mindless games as the laundry piles up. This is also ok. You deserve it.
5. All those cute outfits you spent months buying will be pooped on, peed on and covered in spit up. Always carry backup onesies.
6. When you finally gather up the energy to tackle the chores, baby will inevitably wake up from said nap.
7. You’ll miss your freedom and feel guilty for doing so. You’re human and this is normal.
8. You’ll break most, if not all, of your “I-would-never-do-that-as-a-parent” rules.
9. Sometimes, as you’re holding your screaming child, ‘well meaning’ parents will tell you: “enjoy it, he won’t be this little for long”. It’s ok if you don’t enjoy these parts. Parenthood is a hard and long winding road. What they mean to say is savor the good and try not to let the not-so-good beat you up.
10. At times you will be filled with despair, confusion, frustration and utter joy. This new, tiny human will teach you anything and everything there is to learn about your new meaning of life. Take it one loving day at a time and you’ll do great.