Being a parent is arguably one of the most challenging and most eye-opening experiences a person can have in their lifetime. They say it shapes you and molds you and ultimately changes the person you are for the rest of your life. While not all of us are lucky enough to have our parents still around, those of us who are should be taking advantage of all of the knowledge they have to share.

When you have some time, sit down with your parents and have a conversation with them. Ask them questions (like maybe one from down below) and really absorb what they have to say. You might be surprised at the answers you get, and it will absolutely strengthen the already incredible bond you share with someone who was so instrumental in your life, and raising you to be the person who you are today.

1. Tell me the story about my birth.

2. What kind of parent did you think you would be? And what kind of parent do you think you ended up being?

3. What was your biggest fear about raising kids?

4. What do you think I missed out on growing up when I did, versus had I grown up when you did?

5. Did you ever want more children?

6. What’s your favorite thing about being a parent?

7. What’s something about you that has nothing to do with family that you love about yourself?

8. What are your goals now that you aren’t my caretaker anymore?

9. What was something you took away from how you grew up that you either wanted to replicate, or never do as a parent?

10. Did your views on religion/sex/family dynamics/politics change because of having kids?

11. How would you describe yourself to a complete stranger?

12. What is something I still do not know about you?

13. What is something that happened when I was growing up that completely shaped the way you raised me afterwards?

14. Tell me about when you found out you were going to have me.

15. Is there something about me that is completely identical to you? Is there something about me that is completely the opposite of you?

16. What was the hardest part about me growing up?

17. Do you think I will/would make a good parent?

18. Did you struggle with the decision to have kids?

19. What was I like as a baby?

20. Who was your biggest inspiration as a caretaker?

21. What is your favorite part about yourself?

22. What challenges did you and my father/mother/your partner have to work through as co-parents?

23. How did being a parent affect your relationships outside of the one with me?

24. Tell me about a time when you really hated being a parent.

25. Was there ever a time you really doubted your ability to raise me?

26. What do you do differently now that I’m grown up?

27. Are you proud of who I’ve become?

28. How did you pick my name?

29. Tell me about a favorite memory from my childhood.

30. What made you feel ready to be a parent?

31. Describe the difference between the love you have for a partner and friends, and the love you have for your children.