1. We have super, super thick skin.
Seriously almost nothing will faze us. Unless you tell us we were pitchy when we were singing…then we’re going to be internal for the next 36 hours. Years of being told we weren’t tall enough, short enough, skinny enough, blonde enough, curly enough, blah-blah-blah enough have gotten us to the point where we take almost nothing personally. Say what you need to say – we’ll sleep just fine.
2. We are crazy ambitious.
Maybe it’s all of the Pinterest quotes or the interviews with the Idina’s of the world but we have a drive inside of us that is incomparable. We’re not afraid to make our own opportunities because we know there is ~No Day But Today~. (See…Rent is always appropriate.)
3. We will be your most entertaining girlfriend ever.
Maybe because of spontaneous karaoke or maybe because of the crass things that come out of us after spending one too many hours in the costume shop during college but rest assured: you will never be bored. You will be laughing and constantly in awe of the tales we have to tell. Trust. Just trust.
4. We are not even a little afraid to say what we think.
Years and years of critiques have made us experts at delivering razor sharp take downs while still sounding so professional. We’ve also basically been taught every opinion is valid so long as it can be backed up. This may NOT be true but we’re sticking to it. Mostly because we hate the idea of Lea Michele in a Wicked Movie. **Team Krysta Rodriguez**
5. You will never have to guess what we are feeling.
We will wear our hearts unapologetically on our sleeve. The girl that misses the D in On My Own but gets Eponine anyway? We’ll be listening to Natalie Weiss and stuffing our face with doughnuts and vodka. To know us is to love us, and we’ll never make it a secret about exactly what is going on.
6. We care about what we look like.
One of my favorite college stories is when the head of the design program ran into my roommate (another musical theatre major) at the gym and said “It’s good to see you here. More of you SHOULD be here.” And then she went on her merry, jogging way.
But for real we need to be in great. shape. We are expected to belt Es, dance, and perform emotionally draining characters 8 nights a week. You need to be in peak physical condition to even consider that. Even if we abandon the life that mindset still resonates and you get to reap the benefits. You’re welcome.
7. We can always find the silver lining.
There is absolutely no worth to seeing you didn’t get a role and continuing to wallow until the show wraps. How do you spin it, how do you make it positive? We are goddamn MASTERS of this. And can do it whenever you need.
“Oh I didn’t Ren in Footloose even though I out-sang him every step of the way? Well now I get to dance in every number be the dance captain which is WAY more valuable.”
8. We are driven mofos.
We will stop at nothing to make our dreams come true. We will be the annoying people at someone’s door around 3 AM just begging to talk to them. We know the value of creating your own opportunities and we will never let them pass us by.
9. We can “Fake It ‘Till We Make It”
This is an old trick my dance teacher taught me about smiling so big I distracted the people from actually looking at my feet. But it applies to everyday life too! I meet you at an event and don’t like you? Well you will never know. There are no awkward moments around musical theatre peeps because we are used to being two shades away from totally fabricated at all times. We’ll make it work, don’t you worry.
10. We can have fun anywhere.
If we can make our own opportunities, we can make our own fun. You never need to worry about babysitting us because we’ll figure it out. We can entertain ourselves. Several hour long tech rehearsals have prepared us for this moment when you need to schmooze and we need to go away. Don’t sweat it.
11. We’re flexible.
Both with our schedules and physically. Take that where you would like it. If it’s a girl shifting everything around in her day planner for you: Great! If it’s a girl in a garter belt showing off what moves she learned playing Mimi (Heyyyyy back to Rent): Great again!
12. We tend to be incredibly informed.
We are prepared for casting directors to ask us all about the integrity behind a show to who the composer is married to. We aren’t afraid to dig around and make sure we know which way was is up. But, on the flip, we don’t like to be wrong. Soooo…have fun!
13. We are never afraid to show off. Especially if there is karaoke.
If you give me a karaoke machine with “Let it Go” on the system I cannot be held accountable for what may or may not happen.
14. We will always know what shows are coming, which are worth it and where we should save our money.
My rules of thumb:
* Original cast member – see it!
* Non equity tour – skip it
* Experimental or “Groundbreaking” – Read reviews but probably see it
* Kristen Chenoweth – See it!
* Rent – See and sing along to it!