9 Ways To Survive The Holidays Alone

By

As someone who works too much and has family that all lives reeeeeally far away, I am used to this. It sounds sadder than it actually is…or I’m just a lot more depressing than I care to admit. Either way I’ll be drunk off of mimosas and yelling at Oliva Pope while I catch up on Scandal. DM me on Twitter if you’re holidaying solo too — let’s be friends. Okay…it is that depressing. Shit.

1. Come up with a game plan.

Are you going to drink and watch TV all day? Sleep? Catch up on all of the housework you’ve been putting off? You need to have a check list or a definite game plan. Last Christmas I watched a full season of Lost. No joke. It was my first full day off in over a month so I told everyone “Merry Sweatpants Eve” and refused to get off of my couch. I drank two bottles of champagne and developed very late and very confusing feelings for James Sawyer. Just come up with a plan and stick to it. No ifs ands or buts.

2. Stock up.

Remember that no store is going to be open! Go a few days in advance and get your supplies. Alcohol, pizza bites, DVDs, whatever you need. Just make sure you do not have to leave the house for anything because you will run into happy families and you will cry.

3. Call your mom and get a little emotional.

If for no other reason than to remind her that you love her. But also because we all need people whether we’d like to admit it or not. And your mom is the person who will be there for you when you just need a good cry.

4. Treat yo’ self!

Do a face mask — hell, do three!! Take care of your brows, give yourself a manicure and a pedicure and then take an hour-long bath just because. Make yourself feel super relaxed and pampered and then take a nap because of said relaxedness at like, 1:20 in the afternoon. Or maybe you’re taking a nap because you’re drunk; good for you!

5. Stay away from all social media.

Trust. It will just make you angry/resentful/depressed. No one wants to deal with a breakdown on Thanksgiving. Just keep your phone at a safe distance and maybe let your computer battery die. It’s for your own good.

6. Don’t wear pants for the whole day.

Or only wear the comfiest pants. My lonely holiday pants are super ridiculously expensive (I hate myself a little for them) cashmere (jk lol I don’t AT ALL) sweats. They’re adorable and make me feel like a semi-successful adult even when I’m sliding Risky Business style through my kitchen drunk alone off of red wine at 11 AM.

7. Do Something really little kid-esque.

Such as going sledding, building a snowman, watching only Disney movies, or eating chocolate all day. This is an excuse to behave as ridiculously as you choose because no one will be around to judge you for it. Run fly and be free, comrade.

8. Accept it.

If you sit there hoping and wishing and praying that something is going to come along for you to do you will be exponentially more disappointed when it doesn’t. Decide that being alone is what you’re going to do and remember that it’s only 24 hours and then it’s over. You’ll be fine.

9. Maybe be drunk.

Maybe I have a problem…