You’re allowed to take care of yourself, too.
The idea of self-care is one that I find to be talked about a lot, but when it comes to practicing self-care it’s rare.
For a long time (in fact I’m still learning how) I never put myself first. I would wear myself out to make sure those around me were happy and healthy. I was the definition of setting myself on fire to keep others warm.
While yes of course, it’s great to be there for people and making others feel good, makes you feel good too. But, when putting others first means running on fumes and putting your own life on hold, it can become toxic.
It took me a long time to realize that it’s okay to take a step back. It’s okay to cancel plans with a friend because you really need a day to collect yourself. It’s okay that you can’t answer every single 3 am call from your friend. You can’t always be at everyone’s beck-and-call and that’s okay. In fact, don’t be.
Don’t allow yourself to lose yourself in other people. Being a great friend doesn’t mean you always have to drop everything to help your friends. It means being a shoulder to cry on, but also realizing you’re in need of support too.
You deserve to treat yourself the way you do your friends.
You deserve to take time for yourself. Whether it’s time to lay in the tub and watch re-runs of friends, or getting back into your fitness schedule. You deserve to take time to deal with your own problems. We are human. That means like our friends, we too get sad, angry, or stressed out and we need to listen to our bodies too. We need to make sure we aren’t brushing our feelings aside to uplift our friends. Our feelings matter. We must listen to them.
Self-care can be eating healthy and going to the gym, but it can also be going to bed early instead of going to that party. Or maybe it’s simply writing in your journal, or reminding yourself to drink water.
We are important people. We are the only person who lives in our body, and is with us 24/7. Why not take care of that person?
Allow yourselves to take breaks, and the time you need for yourself. Never feel bad for taking care of yourself. Your friends will understand, and if they don’t, find new friends. Friends who prevent you from growing too, aren’t friends worth keeping.
When you think about ways to show your friends how much you appreciate them, and how much you love them,
Show yourself the same.
You deserve the same.