When my ex-boyfriend crosses my mind, which is infrequently now, I can wish him love with his new girlfriend. I hope he has found a relationship that lasts forever and nourishes his and her spirits. I am no longer looking to compare myself to her or any woman.
People react to trauma in varying ways. My grief burned the epidermis of my being, and it made me extra sensitive to things. I cry at music and art. I even cry sometimes when I visit the ocean. Beautiful things overwhelm me. I am strong, but I can falter.
The most shameful part of this relationship, for me, is how I begun to crave him and the tumult he brought into my life. I was broken down to the point that I took blame for everything.
My advice to women is to never give away sex easily. Unless casual sex is something that benefits you or that you want, make men wait. Using sex to garner love is the easiest way to wreck your own self-esteem.
If the government wanted to legislate what you could or could not do with your penis, wouldn’t you protest? I’ve seen how some of you behave when we want to take away your guns, and those aren’t even attached to your body.
We’ve been taught that good manners can save us, but all they do is keep us directly under the thumb of men who spit out the word feminist like it’s a curse word instead of a call for unity.
I think dignity comes from being authentic. We need to be vocal about our expectations. We need to make sure people are on the same page with our expectations for how we hope to be treated.