You Only Love Her When It’s Convenient For You

Svetlana Manic

pants on fire.
Took what you needed
and left her to die. Her
strength was weak
and your lies were strong.
You drained her of life
and then moved on
without a thought,
without a care.
You were selfish.
Don’t you dare
pretend you loved her.
She loved you.
Her only flaw was
giving you too
many chances
to prove you cared
when she knew the answer
but was too scared
to believe it.

She trusted you.
Put her loyalty and faith
in your word
but you have no space
left in your heart
for anyone else
but you.
Always about you.
Her pain was real
while yours was fake,
lying to her
in order to make
her your slave.
Tying her up
with your promises
that are about as real as a cup
of ice surviving in the desert.

She wants to escape
but you say “no”
knowing that’s enough to
get her to stay and show
her nothing but pain.
Letting her breathe
only when you say it’s ok.
And she sees
what you’re doing.
But she’s stuck, she’s struck
by the lightning amuck
the storm you created
just to tear her down,
taking away the rainbow
without a sound
leaving her hopeless.
Because the rainbow
is what she had left.
So why wouldn’t you take it?

You speak with her
on your terms.
You see her
on your terms.
You block her
on your terms.
You use her
on your terms.
She is your tool.
She is your toy.
And the scariest part
is boy
does she believe it.
Why does she believe she can’t leave?
How does something so obviously fake
feel so real?
When did she stop taking care of herself
in order to take care of you
to give you the strength and energy
just to come back around and screw

Enough is enough.

She’s moving on.
You had a hold
on her, trapping her
but she’s gold
and you’re just bronze,
covering it up,
trying to pretend to be
something you’re not
in order to fool her.
But the fool is you.
You can’t use people
and expect to choose
who stays and who goes.
That power isn’t yours.
Your lies were hidden
but the truth always shows
In the end.
You had her trapped,
unable to leave
no matter how hard she tried
to escape and be free
of the sociopath next door.
But she did.
She left you behind
to save herself amid
the lies and the hurt
to rebuild her soul
and pick up the pieces
that you stole
and destroyed.

She is free.
She is stronger.
She is gold.

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