What To Know About Being With A Girl With Anxiety (From A Licensed Therapist Who Has Anxiety)

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Understand that we cannot control our anxiety at times and that we spend most of our day managing her anxiety.

 

Realize that anxiety is a real mental thing and that no, we do not want to act this way.

 

Anxiety does NOT = drama.  In fact, despite popular belief, girls who suffer from anxiety want the opposite of drama and get upset when they know their anxiety caused drama.

 

You will have to be a little extra kind sometimes and give words of encouragement like, “Everything is okay.”

 

Worrying is not a choice for girls with anxiety, it just happens.

 

Anxiety prevents us from doing new and exciting things, but that does not mean that we don’t want to do them.  They are just scarier for us than they are for you.

 

The idea of having dinner with a new couple you met through work evokes panic and we immediately try to think of topics of conversation to last the evening.

 

Sometimes we need to be alone.  With the door shut.  But we want you to come and check on us.

 

We need you to tell us we look good and to confirm our outfit choice several times.  It’s annoying, yes, but it makes us feel less anxious.

 

Anxiety makes us stronger inside because it forces us to be completely self-aware at all times.

 

We like to know where you are.  It’s not in a creepy way, but in a comforting way.  Being able to visualize where you are makes us feel less anxiety.

 

Call when you say are you are going to call.  We wait by the phone and get worried when you do not.  If you cannot call, send a quick text.  If we care about you, this is one of the most basic ways we need you to show you care about us.

 

Anxiety helps us be extra caring toward others because we are always considering other people’s feelings.

 

Please do not call us inflexible.  The true fear we feel about trying something new or pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone is at times debilitating and incredibly frustrating to ourselves.  We know its anxiety so please help us work on it instead of calling us names.

 

Anxiety helps us read other people very well.  Trust the gift side of anxiety and let us help you determine who are good people and who are not.

 

Anxiety is all encompassing and a daily struggle that being a girl does not make any easier.