This is one of the most striking truths that all of us must accept—every people who come into our lives has their own reason and purpose as to why we meet them, stay with them, or let go of them. I know, it kinda sucks but that’s how the world plays its game. We’re going to cross paths with someone, have good times with them, then all of sudden it’s us again without them.
Losing people who mean so much to us can sometimes kill us inside, figuratively and literally. It’s hard to let go when we thought everything’s fine and both of you are on the same page. But crappy things can happen, it’s uncontrollable, it’s inevitable, we just have to deal with it. We must admit to ourselves that people come and go, that there’s nothing permanent here on this planet, and that everyone we encounter will affect our lives in some ways.
Just like what you did when you enter my messy life.
I’ve been running circles, trying to fight, trying to survive. I don’t know where I am going but I know I am bound to somewhere. Tried to distract myself so as to forget the bitter lies and the crooked ways of life—and then you came.
Like catching lightning, so quickly, so reckless, you had me at just one glimpse. I thought this would be one of those romantic stories I’ve read on books and watched on cinemas, but it was different, it’s more realistic and true. And I know, I know for sure that I am damned.
You’re a blessing in disguise, one that must be taken care of. Your heart is so pure that it doesn’t even know how to hurt someone, that all it could do is to love with no conditions, no limits, and no hidden agendas. And then I fell, oh, how I truly fell.
I met you in the scruffiest time of my life and I thought you would be my escape, to divert my attention and be my distraction; I was so all in, without second thoughts, I am willing to risk it just to give it a chance again. You were so good to be true and I was this vulnerable kid, waiting and expecting. We’ve had it good, we started out right, but we ended it wrong, I ended it wrong.
I was too blind to see the truths in your eyes, they were way too obvious, but I was so foolish to believe because they’re craving, they’re longing, they’re yearning. I was eager to let loose and trust fate that it would lead us to somewhere better, but I became too content that whatever we had that time would just grow on its own. How I wish I could go back and fix things, how I truly wish.
But here we are now, on our own, with our lives ahead of us. Our story may be short and incomplete but your impact on my life would remain forever.
You’re now one of the best mistakes I’ve done, one that I would always remember as I lie awake in my bed at 2 in the morning, with my heart pounding.
You’re that particular scent I would smell in a shop, one that would take me to the memory lane of our precious times together.
You’re that song I might hear somewhere, one that would bring so much feels I thought was gone but was just hidden.
You’re that exact line from a poem or prose, one that would leave me crushed.
You’re that scene from a series, one that I would always watch and rewind until it makes me tired.
You’re that unforgettable dream at night, one that would always haunt me when I awake.
You’re a lesson I learned in a hard way, one that would unfailingly remind me of how to take care of valuable things, of how to take things seriously and slowly, of how not to let my heart overpower my brain, of why people would come and go once their purpose in my life is done, of what matters more in this life and not just to chase someone who’s gone, and to accept things as it is.
The role you play in my life is now done and I thank you for playing it well. If not for you, I wouldn’t know the difference between reality from fantasy. If not for you, I wouldn’t be able to write these things. If not for you and for your welcoming nature, I wouldn’t be here, back to where I am supposed to be. If not for your care and concern, I wouldn’t be able to survive this life. Thank you, I must say.
Don’t worry. It’s okay that you’re not here in my world anymore, it’s all right that you choose the other way, ’cause it’s my fault anyway. I am the one to blame.
I just wish all the best for you and all the things you deserve, my dearest stranger.